11.08.13 U/D The Aviators - Part Forty-Three/Four [M Shadows/Val]

Cute installment, it's nice to see the interaction between the sisters.

Yeah, I really like the dynamics between Chelle and Val

~~~~


Part Thirteen

“Jason Denmore, he’s a wicked guitar tech, Walter put me onto him.”

Michelle and I walk into the house in time to hear Brian raving about some new guy he met in Los Angeles. He is a guitar technician that specialises in working with metal and progressive rock bands. As Brian’s rambling on, Matt pokes his head out from the living room and grins, his eyes falling upon the bags we’re toting.

“Hey, you’re back.” He tilts his head at us an expression of wonderment on his face. He is obviously, like all men, pondering the wisdom behind women who buy copious amounts of stuff from their favourite stores, and then never actually using the things they purchase.

I smile in answer. Right now, I don’t trust myself to speak. I’ll just let my twin do all the talking. Or at least that’s my plan, whether she or Matt stick to the script remains to be seen.

Michelle nods, putting her bags on the floor, plastic crinkling as she looks to the other room. “What’s Bri going on about?”

Matt shrugs and steps over to take my bags from me. “Just some new guitar tech.” He eyes me, a serious expression now on his face. “Have a good time?” He keeps looking at me, waiting for a response.

As I move to step by him, I clear my throat and murmur a quick answer. “Yeah, it was alright...”

I catch Michelle raise an eyebrow at me. I shake my head in her direction. She sighs and heads into the living room. I make to follow her, but Matt stops me, taking my left elbow in hand and pulling me over to the kitchen bench.

“Sit.” His tone brooks no refusal.

I slowly slide my ass onto the stool, looking down at my hands. One of my nails is chipped; I play with it. Matt frowns and leans his hip against the bench, examining me. I peer up at his face. There is a furrow in his forehead; his hazel eyes hold an expectant look.

“Valary.” He uses my full first name, an obvious sign that I have to talk to him. No getting out of this.

Biting my lower lip, I take several deep breaths, before speaking softly. “Yeah, we had a good time. Did some shopping.” I rub my hands on my pants, sweat making my skin feel clammy. I can’t explain the feeling. Don’t want to explain it. Instead, still rubbing at my pants, I add softly, “Got some new clothes, so I won’t have to keep wearing yours.”

Matt’s lips twitch as he nods a glimmer of laughter in his eyes. But then he asks, “Anything interesting happen?”

That question gives me pause. Here, and now, would be the perfect time to tell him about that guy who came up to us, but at the same time I feel that I don’t want to bother Matt with it. Shaking my head, I cast a longing glance toward the living room. I hope he takes the hint.

But, instead, he growls low, leaning into my comfort zone. “Val. Talk to me.”

I bite my lip, meeting his stern look. Taking a deep breath I fish into my back pocket and pull out the card the guy left on our table, holding it out to him.

He frowns, lips pressing together in a thin line. “What’s this?”

I lift my shoulders, crossing my arms over my breasts. He takes the card and squints narrowly at it, eyes scanning the text. I wait, quietly, watching the expression on his face change as he reads. His eyes darken, lips tightening in a thin line.

He tosses the card onto the bench then pins me with a look. “Who gave you that?”

Breathing out, as I brace my hands against my knees, I say in confusion, “This guy at a cafe Michelle and I were at. He was kind of staring at us. Creeped me out. And then he left that card.”

Matt nods slightly. “Go on.”

I blink. “That’s it.”

“Uhuh.” Matt smirks, yet his eyes are grave. “Why’d you take the card?”

That I do know the answer to. However, I feel a bit weird trying to explain my reasoning to Matt.

He leans more against the bench and tilts his head to the side. “Val?”

Shaking myself, I frown a little, meeting his gaze. “Something...I felt something.” I rub my bottom lip. “The Guild...I...don’t know. I had this thought, that there might be a connection. I don’t know. Just thought maybe you could look it up? See what it’s about?”

Peering up into his eyes I try to gauge his response. Matt says nothing though, and pushes away from the bench, pocketing the card and motioning for me to follow him.

Realising I’m not going to get any answer from him I slip off the stool and walk behind him, as he heads for the living room. I halt in the doorway, observing him as he plonks himself down next to Zacky, who just so happens to have his laptop open on his lap. I tilt my head, as he glances at Matt and gives a little smile.

“Guess what, Shads?”

Matt chuckles and rolls his eyes. “What, V?”

“VU has a whole new line of clothing.” Zacky grins like a kid at Christmas. Not that I’d know what someone feels like at Christmas, I do not remember ever celebrating that time of the year. I’m sure I did with Michelle when I was really little. But who remembers that?

Zacky is still speaking. “It’s a Halloween theme. Fucking rad.”

I watch as Matt smiles faintly, but then his brow creases in thought. “Hey, man. Do me a favour?”

Zacky sucks at his snakebites, nodding. “Sure?”

Matt casts a look toward where I’m standing. I blink at him. He stares at me for a second as he retrieves the card from his pocket. Then he faces his friend again, holding the card out to him between his index and middle finger.

“Search this.” His voice seems tense, but I can’t really decipher his tone. It might be just pure curiosity, or it could be anxiety. Who knows? Only him, I guess.

The guitarist presses his lips together as he takes the card and turns it over, reading the text. One hand holding the card, he uses the other to tap into the search engine. At least that is what I presume. I still haven’t moved from my place in the doorway.

Jimmy notices me standing there and gets up from where he’s sitting with my twin and Brian. He walks over to me and smiles warmly.

“Hey, whatcha doing, Valary? Come sit with us.”

I hesitate, looking over at Matt and Zacky. The drummer snorts and places a hand against my right shoulder.

“Don’t worry about them, come join us.”

I shake my head slightly. “No, I’m fine, thanks...” I bite my bottom lip, taking a step back. “Actually, I’m a bit tired. Think I might go lie down.” I’m not being completely honest; I actually want to write down my feelings about the day, but it’s not like I want to say that to Jimmy, that’s only for me, and Matt, to know.

Jimmy smiles gently, rubbing my arm softly. “’Kay, take care, then.” He drops his hand, turning to walk back to the others.

I sneak a quick look over at Matt again; he’s leaning close to Zack, gaze focusing on the laptop. Taking my chance, I back out of the doorway and go to our room, shutting myself in and grabbing my journal from the nightstand. Then propping myself up on some pillows on my side of the bed, I flip it open to a blank page, pick up my pencil and am about begin to writing, when I notice that the previous entry was not written by me.

I blink, and lean close to look at the handwriting. Recognising the characteristic curl at the end of the capital letters I realise it is Matt’s penmanship. I stare and stare at the words he has written, and wonder when exactly he could have done so.

Shaking my head, I glance toward the door for a moment, the distant sounds of the guys talking and arguing, floating down the hallway. I dismiss it as background noise and return my focus to the journal, pausing for a long moment, before making a decision.

I’m going to read his entry. See what he has to say. After all, since he’s written it in my journal he obviously can’t be expecting me not to read it. Perhaps he wrote something in there for me to read? Maybe he decides to confess his und- yeah, right. Don’t even go there. He’s probably just made some commentary on my previous diarising.

Plumping up the pillows, I rest back against them and flip back a few pages to the point where Matt has begun his entry. However, before I start reading, I once again check the noise levels outside the room.

Still the same, still busy enjoying each other’s company. Sighing, I settle down, tucking my chin into my chest and allowing my eyes to focus solely on my master’s words.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Matt’s Message

Yeah, so, I got bored because the guys decided to go outside and have a smoke. You know I don’t smoke anymore, not even socially, so I popped in for a lie down. Saw your journal laying on the night stand and had a bit of a read.

Then I figured I’d insert a little note.

Obviously.

So.

One: I hope you had a good time with Michelle. I can’t say that we see eye to eye on anything...but then we kind of rubbed each other up the wrong way back in high school. I just can’t believe that you and she are twins, to be entirely honest. You’re such polar opposites. But, then again, maybe if you’d actually grown up together, that might have been different.

Shit, just the fact that you’re a slave...no words can really describe how that makes me feel. Maybe I’ll try and explain to you face-to-face. Yeah, I know I bought you...paid cash for you...but...yeah.

You amaze me, y’know that? You just manage to put into words these observations that just...jump off the page. Makes me feel like I’m there with you. Heh, I guess I was, hey?

Anyway, you know what still gets to me after these past few months? The fact you’re still so self-fucking-conscious about your body. Yes, I’m gonna put this out there, in writing...just so you know. There’s no need for it. Do you realise how many women would...wish so hard for a body like yours.

Oh, now. Don’t blush. I’m just telling you like it is. Perhaps seeing it here in my hand writing will convince you that it’s true. Because, there’s one thing you have to know about me.

I never lie.

Never.

It’s against my whole...moral code, or whatever.

Wow, I sound like a sap. Okay, enough sweetness. I could fill a pot of it...heh.

Be serious, Shads.

Right. I’m gonna reach my point in a minute.

You’re beautiful, stunning. That night, at the gig. You stood out. And, I just had to, I’m not sure. Have you. That sleazy scumbag, Giovanni...I wondered how you ended up with a guy like him? Maybe you’ll tell me that story one day? Or write it in here for me to read?

Yeah, so...just take this to heart. You. Are. So. Damn. Beautiful.

Period.

Don’t question me on that.

Ever.

Anyway, that’s me done. Heh, that’s the most I’ve ever written, which hasn’t been a public blog to our fans on MySpace. Go figure.

Now back to our usual broadcast...

Shads.

Yet again you surprise me with Matt, I truly never know where he's going next.

Also, the guy with the card, Val is clearly smarter than me cos I never thought it could be related to The Guild. Will wait (im)patiently to find out the results of Zack's web search.

I love writing Matt in this fic, seriously

~~~~~

Part Fourteen

“Valary! Where the hell did- oh, there you are.”

I swing my head around as the door opens and Matt’s head pops around the edge. I give him a faint smile and wave to him. He leans against the doorframe and smiles back.

“What’re you doing?”

I hold up my journal. The corners of his eyes crinkle slightly. Then he pushes away from the doorway, approaching the bed.

I shift my weight a little, tilting my head. “Join me, Master?”

Matt smiles and climbs on the bed, the mattress dipping beneath his bulk. He shuffles around, settling next to me, pulling me close into his side. Leaning my head against his shoulder, I give a soft sigh. He nuzzles into my hair, tucking several strands behind my ears. I peek up at him; his eyes twinkle at me. Blushing, I lower my eyes and return my concentration to my journal.

Matt plays with my hair, remaining in silence, obviously content to just relax with me for a moment. I scribble away absently, but then stop and look up at him again.

“Uh, why aren’t you with the others?”

Matt smirks. “Might ask the same of you, Val.”

“Well, I just needed to be by myself, Master.” I look down, feeling a little anxious. He cups my chin and tilts it up, frowning at me. I bite my lip gently. He brushes his thumb slowly across my lower lip.

Then he says, “You never had a lot of time to yourself, did you.” It’s not quite a question.

I blink hard, stomach rolling slightly, before giving a tiny nod. “No, Master.”

Matt sighs, tilting his head back against the large pillow. His dark hair contrasts against the white of the cover. He breathes deeply then swears softly, before meeting my gaze again.

“Well, I have a proposal then.”

I look curiously at him. “A proposal?”

“Yeah. A couple of hours a day which is solely for yourself, without me, to do whatever you wanna do.” Matt quirks his eyebrows at me. “What do you reckon?”

For some inexplicable reason, tears begin to fill my eyes. One drop finds its way from the corner of my eye down my left cheek. Wiping furiously at my face, I try to smile at him. His brow furrows.

“Val?”

“I’m okay,” I sniffle, rubbing at my eyes. “I...just. No one’s ever...”

“Yeah,” Matt interrupts firmly, “I’m not any of those jerks. I’m your master. And I say you get some ‘Valary’ time. Every day.” He strokes his thumb along my left cheekbone. “Starting from now. So, if you want me to leave, I will.”

I stare at him, a little awestruck. His lips curve in a tender expression, and he rubs the tip of his nose against my cheek. I shiver a little, but then shake my head.

“No, want you to stay, please.” I place my hand against his, holding on for a moment. He looks at our linked hands then nods, settling back against the pillow again.

“Sure. I’ll stay.” He breathes out slowly, wrapping his arm around my waist, and tilting his head so he can watch me. Relaxing into his side once more, I pick my pen up and go back to writing.

Several minutes pass before I stop, giving my hand a rest. “Are they still here?”

“Nah.” Matt rakes his fingers through his hair. “They left.”

I nod slightly, then murmur, “Get any work done, Master?”

Matt chuckles. “Yeah, we got some rad ideas going ‘round between the five of us. Even Johnny had a couple of song ideas, which isn’t usual. He usually leaves the initial song ideas to Jimmy and I.”

I nod again; he adds quietly, “A lot of things have happened in the world, y’know...I’m figuring the new album’s going to take us all on a pretty...dark journey.” He sighs softly. “Anyway, we were starting to go in circles over a point...so we decided to call it a day.”

Glancing up at him, I tilt my head. Matt smiles at me, and then frowns slightly.

“Um...before he left, Zacky said he’d see if he could find something on that card.”

“Oh.” I purse my lips. “So, you didn’t find anything online?”

Matt shakes his head. “Nope.”

Shifting, so as to lay across his stomach, I peer up into his face. “Well, it might just be nothing.” I’m hoping it’s nothing, because for once I want my premonitions to be proven unfounded. I don’t want every little thing I suspect to actually be true. Because, it’s usually bad for me. I always end up getting hurt. And, I don’t want to be hurt anymore.

Matt closes his eyes for a moment, resting them. Then he slits them studying me, I assume. “What if it is something?”

“I don’t know, Master. Guess we’ll just have to figure it out if that’s the case.” I twirl my pen between my thumb and fingers.

He nods, and then asks, “You see my message?”

Sliding my other hand over the pages of my journal, I nod. “Yes.” I don’t trust myself to say anything more than that. The words he wrote are still hard for me to fathom. I can’t believe he wrote them. No man has ever let me know how they felt about me in such an intimate and personal manner. Sure, I might be able to formulate a response in writing, but to say anything more out loud is kind of unsettling to me.

Matt rubs a thumb across the back of my neck. Then he dips his head down, pressing his lips into my hair. Shivering, I shift a little, gazing up into his face. The corners of his mouth turn up, dimples appearing on either side. I feel my cheeks going pink and lower my eyes again.

He chuckles softly before resting his head back against the pillow. I sit up a little, observing his face. He notices me looking, and wrinkles the bridge of his nose and crosses his eyes. I burst into a fit of giggles. He looks...cute...when he does that. That thought stops my laughter. Matt looks at me and uncrosses his eyes.

“You okay?”

I stare at him, and then blurt out, “I’m not beautiful.” I gasp realising seconds after what I just said, blushing right to the roots of my hair. I duck my head down suddenly unable to look Matt in the face. There’s a moment’s silence, filled only by our breaths, mine shallow, and nervy, his calm, steady.

To his credit, Matt makes no comment; instead, he tilts my chin, making me meet his eyes. Then he smiles, the warmth somehow calming my jittery nerves.

I breathe out slowly and whisper, “Forget I said that, Master.”

Matt looks at me thoughtfully. He’s obviously formulating a response to my request. His eyes narrow slightly, eyelashes lowering over his stare. Then he speaks quietly, but firmly, “Val, I told you not to argue with me. I always mean what I say, or write, as the case may be.” He smirks faintly at that final remark.

I blink, looking down. He sighs softly. Then he rubs his thumb against my cheek, before pulling my head to rest against his chest, lying back, and holding me in his arms. I curl into his body, resting my eyes. He trails his fingers from my face, down my neck to my shoulder, rubbing gently. I smile a little.

I hear Matt inhale deeply, then let his breath out in what sounds like a sigh of contentment. Then he nuzzles into my hair, breathing steadily. I close my eyes, allowing myself to relax in his arms, drifting in a semi-conscious state, my breaths slowing.

Matt holds me close, propping his chin atop my head. We remain like that for awhile, not moving, not thinking just resting in each other’s presence.

After awhile, I finish scribbling in my journal; and, after handing it to Matt so he can read it, I curl up against his chest and allow myself to drift off.

* * * * *

Master, you think I’m beautiful? You’d be the first to ever tell me that in any form or manner. Most men put me down all the time...I was only ever there for them to use. To dump their seed into my body, onto my body. They didn’t give two hoots about the way I looked. As long as I obeyed them in every which way, they were satisfied. Definitely satisfied.

No. I’m ugly. A waste of human flesh. Or so some of them told me. You have to understand why I’m hesitant to accept your evaluation of me. Men have lied to me to get me to do their every fancy. They wanted a blow job? They would tell me I was lucky I got to blow them because I was an ugly slut and no gentleman would want me to touch their cocks with my whore mouth. That hurt...it all hurt, but I got used to it.

I never thought my life would get any better you know? You asked about Giovanni? I’d been with him for about two years when you bought me. He wasn’t too bad, really. He was just fat...and his breath stank...he was sleazy more than anything else. He never hurt me, not like other men who had me. He, Giovanni, represented the best of my situation at the time.

Of course, because of the type of person he was, I began acting up. With my other masters I never dared truly to play up because I was so damned scared that they’d do me some serious damage. But, with G...I felt I could get away with a lot of things. And, I guess that’s why, when you showed up, he told you I was ‘damaged goods’. Because, I wasn’t the obedient little slave I should’ve been. That’s why he wanted to get rid of me too.

I know I’m not all that submissive even now. I just don’t think I’m the type. But, somehow you make me want to try harder to be obedient. The rules help to an extent. They’re straightforward, not confusing. They give me something to base my behaviour on. My other masters ruled me by making me fear them. You...rule my...heart. There, I put it in words.

I shouldn’t be admitting this and whether you make some comment or not...I don’t know. But, I...I’ve fallen for you, Master...

Oh...God. I can’t believe I just wrote that...

But, I need to be honest, don’t I? You hate dishonesty, I know that. But, I need to tell you this. If. If you feel you need to put me in my place...tell me I can’t fall for you, whatever...I understand. I’m the slave. You’re the master, what you say, goes. Always.

Anyway. I was wondering something, Master. Why did you buy me? I mean, it takes all sorts to own a slave, but that doesn’t explain why you suddenly decided buying me was a good idea. You don’t seem the type to just go and buy a slave...or even need one?

You don’t have to answer that question, by the way. It’s none of my business, right? You make decisions for yourself that I have no right knowing the why of. But, I can’t help being curious.

All my other masters had had slaves before me and all for the same reason. Sex. But, we’ve hardly slept together...or at least if we do you’ve always made sure I get something out of it as well...and not just as an afterthought. And, not to humiliate me...or make me feel like a slut.

I don’t think sex is the reason you bought me though. It’s something more than that. It can’t be because of the way I look. Yes, I know...we’re back to that. You think I’m beautiful. But, I don’t know about that...I doubt that it’s the reason you decided to fork over some money to some fat sleazebag to get me away from him, and make me your slave. No, that can’t possibly be the reason. It has to be something else.

I guess I could speculate until I was blue in the face, only way I’d ever know is if you decide I deserve an answer. I’m not expecting one, though.

You can respond, or not, as you like to this message...I don’t mind, Master. Whatever you say is enough for me.

Just...know that I...I think I love you, Master...

Yeah... that’s me done.

Man...first you get me with the hot stuff, now you are apparently trying to kill me with cute. Update soon please...I need to see how Matt reacts to that.

I like to keep my readers on their toes

~~~~~


Part Fifteen

It’s been a few days since I wrote that little message in my journal, and something’s changed between Matt and me. I wouldn’t say it’s bad, or good. More like Switzerland. Hah, if you don’t get that, then I have to ask you, were you under a rock your whole life? I mean, I’m a slave and even I know that Switzerland is neutral territory. Anyway, Matt’s just doing what he usually does...at least on the surface. The guys have been in and out, I’ve even hung out with Michelle again. But, there’s just something between us that wasn’t there before.

There’s this...tension...and I have to admit, it worries me a little. I’ve been extra vigilant, y’know? Rule number three – pay attention. But, I can’t seem to pin down what he’s thinking or feeling. He’s like a closed book.

He did something this morning that he hasn’t for awhile, though. He lost his cool with me, but there was no yelling or anything like that. He just shut me out. Not physically, I mean he’s actually sitting right next to me as I’m telling you this. We’re in the living room; he’s watching some game on the television. I’m writing in my journal, again. He hasn’t really acknowledged me all morning. I mean, he’s still gentle with me. Y’know? But, it seems impersonal, almost, as if he’s kind of detached himself.

I don’t know. I don’t know how to go back to the way it was. I mean, it’s not like a huge change or anything, just a subtle shifting of emotions. And, I don’t even know whether it’s to do with what I wrote, or just a coincidence. I mean maybe he’s just in an off mood or something. But, usually if that’s the case, he’d be complaining and groaning, and getting me to do every little thing he can possibly think of. And then he’d fall asleep on the couch and snore away like a runaway motor. Then he’d wake up and be all dimpled smiles, and cheery words.

But, he hasn’t even cracked a smile over the past few days. I think the guys even noticed it. Jimmy made some comment like he always does, and Matt didn’t say anything, when he usually, at least, calls the drummer a ‘jerk’ or a ‘dick’. All out of love, of course.

I hope it wasn’t what I wrote, because if that’s the case...then...hell...awkward city. I can stand it if he tells me that he doesn’t feel the same, or whatever...but this whole not acknowledging me business is getting to me. I’m hanging out on a limb, just wondering.

“Val.”

I jump slightly. Matt’s actually looking at me. I blink at him, meeting his guarded expression.

“Yes, Master?” I’m extra careful to address him properly. His lips twist slightly as he drapes an arm over the back of the sofa. Shifting uncomfortably on my seat, I wait for a response.

He smears a hand over his jaw, pressing his lips together. His brow furrows, and I can see thoughts passing in his mind. I continue to wait, knowing not to push.

Matt breathes out harshly and opens his mouth, speaking in a low voice, “Your message. In your journal. You want to explain to me what that was about?”

I bite my lip and look down, then back up at him. “I...well...I mean...I thought it was clear, Master?”

Matt lifts an eyebrow. “You tell me, Valary.”

I shift beneath his cool stare. “I...well...” My cheeks feel flushed. I hate that he’s putting me on the spot now, considering his behaviour toward me the last few days.

“Valary, talk to me.”

I swallow hard, clasping my hands together in my lap. I look anywhere but at him. Matt groans softly.

“Valary, talk to me. I can’t read your mind.”

“I know, Master...I just...” I peek up at him. He meets my eyes.

“Look, you obviously meant for me to read it. I just want to understand.” He takes his bottom lip between his teeth, pausing for a moment. Before he can continue, though, the sound of the door chimes echoes in the front entrance. I wonder who it could be; the guys didn’t say they were coming over today.

Matt grimaces, standing to his feet. He looks down at me, expression unusually stern, focused.

“Stay here, ‘kay? We’ll finish this conversation.”

I nod obediently. He turns on his heel and walks out to answer the door. I sit and wait, feeling a little anxious. On the one hand I am hoping that it’s nobody important and that Matt will be able to come back so we can finish this discussion and move on. On the other, I’m hoping that it will be someone who can distract Matt from the whole issue because, in truth, I’m scared of his reaction to my written declaration of my feelings for him.

After several moments, I hear Matt’s voice and that of another man rumbling from the front door. Their words aren’t clear, but they become evident as I hear their footsteps approaching the living room door. Obviously, it wasn’t just some random salesmen or doorknocker.

The guy is speaking to Matt in a low voice.

“So, how long has it been now?” I recognise the voice. It’s that guy who called from the Guild. A shiver runs through my body and I huddle into the couch, wrapping my arms around my knees. I’ve never even met the man, and he scares me. Just the tone, and quality, of his voice makes me think of a man who could easily cause me harm.

“I don’t count. A few months, maybe more?” Matt’s response is wary.

“You don’t count?” A hint of incredulity creeps into the guy’s voice.

“No. Is it even important?” There’s tension in Matt’s voice; he’s not happy about the guy’s probing.

There’s a heavy pause, then the man says, as they stop just outside the living room, “Yes, actually it’s very important. Because, what usually happens at around the two month mark, someone from the Guild is supposed to come and assess the situation, make sure everything is up to standard.”

“Up to standard.” Matt repeats the guy slowly, and then adds, gruffly, “What the hell does that mean?”

“There are rules and guidelines that one must follow when owning a slave, Mr Sanders. If those aren’t followed one is at risk of having their slave taken away.” The man’s tone is grim.

I tremble at his words and peek toward the doorway. Matt walks in, brow furrowed even more than usual. The man follows him into the living room. I stare up towards him, taking in his appearance. He’s dressed in a suit, which seems a little out of place considering how casually Matt and I are dressed. But, then this is Huntington, you get all sorts of people living here. His eyes narrow on me; they’re a stark grey, almost steel in essence. I lower my eyes, shivering.

He chuckles low. “Well, she seems to know her place.”

Matt walks around to stand behind the sofa; I see his hands grip the back of the chair, his knuckles whitening. He’s pissed, and I can feel it. I glance up at him. His face is drawn taut, his jaw clenching, white lines appearing on either side of his nose. I look to the man.

He glares at me. “Don’t look at me.”

I drop my eyes.

Matt growls. “Don’t tell her what to do.”

More chuckling, his tone is dark, though. “Matthew Sanders, you may be her Master, but as a Guild representative it is my right, and responsibility, to ensure she behaves as she should.”

A tremor runs the length of my spine. The man approaches the sofa, positioning his body directly in front of me. I can see the pinstripes on his pants, clearly, a dark stain on his left pants leg. I lower my eyes even more. After several seconds pass, he grips my chin and tilts my face to his. I am careful not to look into his eyes, keeping mine directed at the point of his chin.

He clucks his tongue lightly, before releasing me and stepping away. He looks to Matt, I watch from the corners of my lowered gaze.

“Tell me, how obedient has she been?”

Matt’s jaw tightens; and I know why. My behaviour hasn’t ever really been an issue, but I know by Guild standards Matt has been lax. Of course, he doesn’t actually know this, because Giovanni never told him anything of the rules and guidelines. I wait to hear his answer.

“You say there are rules and guidelines, but I don’t know anything about them. No one told me. So, by what standards are we basing Val’s behaviour?” Matt’s words are clipped, strained.

The man smiles faintly before answering, “Instant and unquestioning obedience is the key. All masters are to expect nothing less. Even allowing the tiniest slip is a breach of standards.” I glance up and see him pin Matt with a hard look.

Matt meets his stare evenly. “And if I allow her some leeway?”

The man shakes his head. “Not acceptable. Any slip, and she must be punished.”

I swallow hard at his statement and glance up at Matt. He looks down at me, lips pressing together as before. The man sees our shared look.

“So, we come back to my question.”

Matt sighs, leaning his weight against the back of the sofa. His biceps flex, the muscles in his forearms tighten in hard knots. He avoids looking at me, at him, just staring at the wall. I observe him in silence nervous as to how he’ll answer.

He takes a deep breath, then speaks, slowly, “Since I didn’t know about the guidelines, you can hardly fault me.”

“So, not as obedient as she should?”

Matt stiffens, his eyes darkening, gaze shifting to the other man. “Never said that.”

The man snorts. “No, but that’s the implication.”

Matt gives a tight nod. I tremble. The implication can’t mean anything good for me. I can tell just by the look on the man’s face that this is not acceptable. I bite my lip and look at Matt. He rakes long fingers through his hair.

“So. Exactly what does that mean?” He glowers.

I realise all of a sudden that I don’t know his name. Perhaps it’s better that way, though? Nameless, he can’t be as much of a threat. Still, I am wary of him, as is natural.

He casts a cold look at me then back at Matt.

“Well. You are correct in saying that you can’t be held accountable for something you didn’t know. But, starting from today, I will have to ensure that you will begin to take your position seriously. She is your slave, and she should be treated as such.” He opens a briefcase that I only just notice propped at his feet. Removing several sheafs of paper, and holding them out to Matt, he continues. “These are a copy of the guidelines and suggestions as to what can be done to establish her submission. There’s also a contact list if you should need assistance with anything.”

Matt takes the proffered pages without looking at them, keeping his stony glare fixed on the Guild rep. “Anything else?”

The man straightens, snapping his case close, tucking it beneath his arm. “If you’ve written up some rules, make sure they align with the Guild guidelines, any that don’t, change them or get rid of them.” He glances at his wrist, a gold watch rests there. “I’ll return in a week to see where you’re at.” He looks at me then nods to Matt. “Good day. I’ll see myself out.” With that, he exits the room, leaving Matt and I alone to ponder the abruptness of his coming, and going.

I blink rapidly as I swing my legs around and plant my feet on the floor. Matt moves way from the sofa and goes to stand by the window, staring out, face hard. Rubbing at my knees, I try to think of something to say.

Matt speaks first though, his voice deceptively calm. “Has that happened before?”

I bite my lip, trying to remember if it ever has, deciding that I can’t and shaking my head slightly. “Not to me, Master. But, I’ve heard stories. They say it’s always real quick...they go in, say what they have to say, then leave.”

Matt turns his head slightly to look at me. “But, not to you?”

I shake my head. “Maybe they do it randomly, Master. I don’t know. Maybe they do it when they think something’s gone wrong.”

Matt rubs his thumb along his bottom lip then joins me on the couch. He reaches out, taking hold of my right hand, gently rubbing his thumb over the back of it. I fix my eyes on our joined hands. He sighs deeply; then he rustles the pages the man gave him. I give them a cursory glance, then away to the floor.

Matt rumbles in his chest. “These guidelines. Do you know what they are?”

I shake my head. “No. I’ve never been shown them.” I peek up at him. His expression is still close. I wonder what he’s thinking, what he’s feeling. He releases my hand and smooths his palm over the pages, it rustles at his touch. Then he shakes them slightly resting them on his lap.

“Well, we’d better look them over, then.”

For some reason that idea scares me. Shifting away a little and shaking my head, I murmur a little apprehensively, “You can look at them...I’d...rather not.”

Matt frowns at me. “Val. You need to see them.” He takes my hand again, running his thumb over my knuckles. “We both need to know what they are, so we don’t have any problems.”

Tucking my legs beneath my bottom, I curl next to him, peeking nervously at the pages. Matt smiles faintly at me, barely even a flicker of his lips, before looking down at the page and reading out loud.

“The Guild of Dominants and Submissives has, for the purpose of maintaining strict standards of procedure and protocol, provided these guidelines for all who find themselves’ living as a Master or slave. To enable smooth running of a household, these guidelines are to be strictly adhered to. Any lapse in adherence to these guidelines is a serious breach of standards.” Matt pauses from reading, lips twisting in a sour expression, like he’s tasted a lemon. He continues though, making no comment as yet.

“Each guideline is lain out to maximise ease of interpretation, and one should make absolutely certain one is familiar with each one, perfectly.” Matt shakes his head and glances at me. “Perfectly? What do they think we are? Robots?”

I shrug, keeping my eyes on the page. He sighs, reaching up to brush a lock of hair from my face before continuing his reading.

“The most important point that needs to be made, and which sets the standard for the rest of the guidelines is this: The Master controls everything. His word is final in every situation and hence the only word that the slave should adhere to.” Matt snorts slightly. “Well, it’s not like we argue with that, right?” He eyes me.

I shake my head, “No, Master.”

He returns his eyes to the document, scans the rest of the front page, and then flips over to the next. For a long moment he stares at the print. I look also, taking in the rules written there. They’re written in terse language detailing in ruthless prose exactly how a slave should behave and what a Master should do to enforce such behaviour.

Matt continues to read, not out loud anymore, though. Then, gritting his teeth, he grinds out roughly, a hint of disgust in his voice, “I don’t want to read this bullshit, seriously.” He tosses the pages on the coffee table.

I stare at them then back up at his face. “That guy will be back next week...”

“Fuck that,” Matt growls, standing up. “He can’t do shit.” He pauses, grimacing, looking down at me. “Right?”

I shrug. “I don’t know, Master. Maybe...” I hesitate before continuing, “Maybe we should read the rules? Just in case...I mean...we could always pretend that we’re following them? Or tell him that we are?” I frown at myself, wondering where I just got the gumption to suggest such a thing.

Matt catches my look and smirks. “Yeah? That might be an idea. But, ugh...let’s not do it now. I don’t think I can stomach any more of this shit, to be honest.” He glares at the document as if staring at it will make it disappear.

I nod, not arguing with his sentiment. Not that I’d argue with him at any rate. Regardless of Guild guidelines, whatever they are, I know what I am and as far as I know and have been trained to do so, I will not question Matt in any way. At least not out loud. I still think the sooner we look at them the better we would be. However, Matt is already heading for the living room door, obviously wanting to go do something else.

I sit there watching him. He moves to walk out but then he pauses in the doorway, one hand grasping the frame, before turning to peg me with a look. I bite my lip, tilting my head. He frowns deeply then turns to face me, crossing his arms over his chest.

“What, Master?”

Matt chews at his bottom lip, before answering, “Our discussion got interrupted, didn’t it?”

I nod slowly. He rubs his jaw. “I hadn’t forgotten about it, if you were wondering.”

I shake my head, I hadn’t forgotten either; just the abruptness of the Guild rep’s visit and then focusing on the guidelines had pushed it from my thoughts. “No, Master. Do you want to-?”

He cuts me off, smearing a hand over his face. “Not now. I need to think about all this.” By ‘this’ I know he means the whole Guild thing. He goes on, “Watch TV or something; come to the bedroom in an hour.”

He doesn’t wait for my response, turning on his heel and walking out of the room, leaving me alone. I blink at the spot he was just standing in, wondering again what he’s thinking, what he’s feeling. However, part of me is grateful that he’s postponing our little talk. Maybe in this next hour, I’ll have time to think how to respond to any questions he might have, and also how to answer the one he has already attempted to ask.

Sighing a little, I decide there’s nothing I can do now but to do as he suggests. So, I grab the remote from where he usually leaves it, and flopping back on the couch, getting comfortable, I flick the television on and allow myself to immerse myself in whatever mindless soapie happens to be showing.

Well shit, The Guild turn up and ruin everyone's days. Bastard! I like Val's idea of pretending to follow the rules, but I'm sure that will bite them in the ass.

You know how in love I am with this story Just thought I'd pop in to say hey *waves* and to let you know I'm eagerly awaiting updates

@Ciara haha yeh the Guild sucks!

@Phyll - HEY! Glad to see you made it here. And I'll eventually get to the new chapters...lol I'm trying to update once a day with the older chapters. While I continue to mull over the next chapter after the last one you read. lol.

~~~~~

Part Sixteen - “Why do you think I bought you?”

Love is not part of a slave’s life. A slave can adore her Master, revere Him, and worship Him and the ground he walks upon. But, a slave must never allow herself to fall in love.

Having gotten bored with the show on TV, I am looking over the guidelines myself. I’ve skimmed the main guidelines, mainly due to the fact that I know Matt will want to look at them with me. However, directly down the bottom of the final page is a disclaimer that I cannot believe is written there. A slave must never allow herself to fall in love? Well, that just screws everything doesn’t it? And what about the Master? Is he not allowed to fall in love with his slave? I scan the last part of the disclaimer.

These are the words: A Master must remember that as Lord and commander He should maintain the balance of power. A Master may care for His slave, as much as one would care for any other prized possession. If a Dom feels anything more than this the balance of power will shift. A Master who loves His slave is no longer in control of her. She now has power over Him and that is not acceptable.

I can’t continue. Tossing the pages back onto the coffee table, I stare at it feeling an uncomfortable prickling in my eyes. Tears. Hot, stinging, wetness. I wipe furiously at my eyes not wanting to go to Matt looking like I’ve been drowning myself. Taking several deep breaths, I sit back, tilting my head back, and blinking hard. Once I feel composed, I stand and move to leave the living room. Time to see if Matt’s ready for me.

I walk to our bedroom and peer through the doorway. I can just see Matt; he’s sitting in darkness, on the chair by the bed. His ankles are crossed before him and he has my journal in hand. His eyes are focused on the pages, and he doesn’t look up.

I clear my throat, walking in hesitantly. He doesn’t lift his gaze. Biting my lip, I halt just inside the door.

“Master...?”

He still makes no move to look at me. But, he does lift one finger slightly. Wait...

I wait, shifting on my feet. I can see his eyes moving as he’s obviously reading. I keep shuffling on one spot, nervous, feeling a little unsettled, wondering what thoughts are circling in his mind. After what feels like forever, Matt lifts his eyes to me. They’re unreadable and that almost undoes me. Pressing my lips together hard, I force myself to hold still until he says something.

Matt stares at me then says, “Come here, sit down.”

I nod almost to myself, shuffling over to sit on the edge of the bed, facing him. He leans forward, propping an elbow against his knee, resting his chin in his hand. His fingertips tap lightly at his bottom lip as he looks at me, thoughtfully.

“So,” he finally says, “you want to explain this?” He holds up my journal so I can see what I wrote.

This time I’m a little more prepared to answer the question, yet I’m still apprehensive as to his reaction. Breathing deeply, I sit back a little, staring down at my hands. Clasping them tightly in my lap, I twist them a little, while getting my words together.

Keeping my gaze on my hands, I whisper my answer, feeling my voice shaking on my words. “Well, I was talking about why I felt that obeying you wasn’t the terrible thing it was with my other masters...”

“Is that all?” Matt’s voice reveals no emotion as he questions me.

I bite my bottom lip, chewing at it slightly. “No, Master.”

“Go on, then.”

I look up at him, feeling that same prickling sensation I did earlier. He tilts his head at me an anxious look creeping into his eyes.

“Val, it’s okay. I’m not mad at you.” His voice takes on a warm tone. That completely does me in, and I just allow the tears that are forming to complete their journey from the corners of my eyes, cascading down my face.

Matt gets up and moves to sit next to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders, pulling me close. I lean against him, wiping at my face.

“I’m sorry...”

“Don’t be.” He digs in a pocket and retrieves a scrunched up, yet clean, tissue, using it to wipe my tears away. He says quiet for a moment, giving me a little time to compose myself again.

Then he murmurs low, “Talk to me.”

Looking up into his face, I draw on the gentleness of his expression to give me courage to speak. “I think I...have feelings for you.” I take a deep breath before going on. “I...I don’t know where they’ve come from...I just...I’m falling for you...” I bite my bottom lip, preventing anymore words from exiting, feeling as if I’ll start waffling if I do.

Matt is silent, he makes no move to respond, instead turning his head to look around the room. I shiver, again wondering what’s going through his mind. I don’t interrupt his contemplation though. He takes several moments before meeting my eyes, expression serious. He still says nothing, just studying me with a long thoughtful look. I tuck my chin down. He reaches out to cup my cheek, rubbing a thumb across the curve of my face.

I bite at my bottom lip more, and then whisper low. “I don’t think I’m allowed to fall for you, Master...”

“What do you mean?” Confusion darkens his eyes. I shiver and shake my head.

“The rules...”

Matt scowls. “Don’t tell me you looked at the rest of them without me?”

“No, Master...just this last little footnote...on the last page.”

Matt growls; I flinch, a little surprised by the anger I can feel coming from him. But, in an instant I realise it’s not me he’s angry at.

“God damn those sonofabitches.” He sits back and balls his hands into tight fists. I hesitate before resting a hand over one of his. He is extremely tense. Slowly, I uncurl his fist, tracing my fingers over his palm. He shivers and looks down at my hand. “Val.”

I stop and pull my hands back into my lap. “Sorry.”

He lifts his eyes to mine, shaking his head. “Don’t, Val.” He sighs, rubbing his hands against his jeans. “Don’t be sorry. I’m just pissed off at them, is all.” He groans and bangs a fist against the mattress. “Someone should overhaul the system.”

I blink at him. He cracks a wry grin. “If I had the know-how...” He trails off and pushes up off the bed. I look up at him. He looks back down at me, thoughts flickering in his eyes. “Tell me, if it weren’t for that rule? Would you...” he pauses.

“Would I what, Master?” I rub at my arms, wondering where his question is leading. Even though deep down I know what he’s getting at. I mean, what have we just been talking about?

Matt looks severely at me. “Would you consider being with me?”

That is a weird question... “I am with you...”

“No, I mean as boyfriend/girlfriend.” Matt cocks his eyebrow at me. I feel suddenly light headed.

“What, Master?” He can’t mean that question; I mean he hasn’t even really reacted to my sort-of-declaration of my feelings toward him. I’ve just practically spilled my guts, and he hasn’t even raised a sweat, really. He is still somewhat detached; so, his question shocks me a little.

Matt rolls his eyes. “Val. Pay attention.” His voice is mild. “I’m going to ask you again, but don’t expect me to repeat myself, we clear?”

“Yes, Master.” I nod obediently, trying to force all my thoughts from my mind and focus my attention on him. “Crystal.”

Matt smirks faintly then becomes serious once more. “Would you consider being my girlfriend? If the rules didn’t exist.” He reaches out to lift my chin. “Be honest.”

I tremble, averting my eyes. Too many emotions are clamouring for attention inside me. I don’t really know if I can answer him. It’s one thing to admit to him that I’ve fallen for him. But, quite another to take it a further step and commit to a position.

Considering that I’m his slave, his property, I have no right to answer that question. Yet, on the other hand, he is my Master and if he asks something of me, I must answer, because as his slave I have no choice. It’s the paradox of my life. And, to be completely truthful about what I think, it sucks. It just majorly sucks.

“Valary, you going to answer my question?” Matt is frowning at me now.

I blink. “Sorry, was thinking...”

“About?” His voice deepens his expression even more serious than before.

I shake my head. Matt glowers at me. I quiver beneath his stern look. “Just how much this sucks.”

Matt folds his arms over his chest. “I see. Would you rather I didn’t own you.”

Pressing my hands between my knees, I give a tight nod of my head. “I don’t want to be owned by anyone, Master...I just wish...” I stop, feeling something choke my words, and realising that tears are trickling down my face. Matt stares at me then shakes his head at me.

“Answer my question, then I’ll leave you alone for a bit. I need to go see Syn and Zacky; they said they were going to get that guitar tech to come over to Zack’s place.”

I look up at him, wiping the back of my hand over my face. I can taste the salt of my tears; I try to ignore it, meeting Matt’s unyielding expression.

“Yes...if the rules didn’t exist...I’d...I’d consider it...” More than consider it, I’d want it so bad it would cut deep if he didn’t feel the same way. I swallow hard then complete the thought. “I’d consider being your girlfriend...but only...only if you felt the same way about me...” I look down once I finish talking, unable to handle looking at him as I wait for a response.

Silence settles around us, as I wait. It is heavy, weighing down on me. I have to admit, I am absolutely terrified of how Matt will respond. I know if he shuts me down, shuts me out, it’ll ruin me. I know I’ve only been with him a short while, running only into months. But, and I know this sounds corny, he completes me, and makes me feel human, not just an object that he owns.

The quiet stretches on and I wonder if he ever will say anything. I peek up at him. He isn’t even looking in my direction. He is staring out the window, lines furrowing his brow. Biting my lip, I think maybe I should repeat what I said. But then he turns to look at me. His face is clouded, eyes revealing nothing.

“Val.” He rubs at his face. “Why do you think I bought you?”

I tilt my head, thinking what exactly the relevance of that is. “Um...don’t know...”

Matt eyes me then laughs roughly. “No. Guess you wouldn’t.” He turns away again.

I lean forward waiting to see if he’ll go on. But he doesn’t. Matt walks over to the dresser and grabs his keys, wallet and phone, pocketing them. Obviously he’s not going to elaborate.

He braces his palms against the dresser and flexes his arms absently then looks at me again. “I’m going out now. Stay here and don’t answer the door.”

I nod slightly, lowering my eyes. I see his shoes moving across the floor as he walks out of the room, leaving me alone. I close my eyes and bite my bottom lip hard as I hear the front door opening, closing and then the sound of his bike starting up and pulling out of the driveway.

And then, he’s gone. And I realise I’ve never felt so alone in my life. And it hurts. It really, really hurts. Rolling onto my back on the bed, I grab a pillow, wrap my arms around it and, burying my face into its softness, allow myself to let go of my emotions and just cry.

Oh my god, is Matt actually falling for Val outside of the whole Master/Slave thing? Poor boy is confused, I can see why.

Yeh, he is confused isn't he?

~~~


Part Seventeen – Interlude

Zacky opened the front door and peered out as he recognised the familiar growl of Matt’s Harley, rolling up the driveway. He stepped out onto the front porch, crossing his arms. Matt brought the beast to a halt, switching the engine off and swinging off the seat. Removing his helmet, tucking it under his right arm, he crossed over the driveway to step onto the porch.

“You took your time,” Zacky smirked. Matt just rolled his eyes and pushed passed him through to the front hall. The guitarist followed him inside. “What’s up with you?” he asked, as if he could feel something was a little off with the singer.

Matt shook his head, setting his helmet down on a table near the front door. “Nothing. Is Syn here?”

“Yeah, he got here half an hour ago. Michelle’s with him.” Zacky rubbed at the back of his neck then added, “The new guitar tech hasn’t arrived yet. Should be here soon.”

Matt nodded, absently, and made his way toward Zacky’s living room where he could hear voices; Brian and Michelle having what sounded like a heated argument. He paused outside just as he caught the tail end of Michelle’s sentence.

“...unfair. I mean, no one should have to be in that kind of position.”

Matt frowned as Brian responded. “Yeah, well it’s not like she chose it, is it? And I doubt Matt really likes it that much either.”

“I don’t think he gives a shit. I mean...jeeze, he treats her....”

Matt stepped into the room, interrupting their conversation in a gruff tone, “If you’re talking about Val, I treat her a lot better than any other asshole in her life ever has.” He glowered at Val’s twin.

Michelle met his sharp look and sighed. “I won’t dispute that. But, you must admit, slavery’s a bit outdated.” She gave him a look which bordered upon disgust. Matt shrugged, taking a seat on a leather lounge next to Brian. Michelle sighed loudly, and then stood up and walked out.

Matt watched after her then groaned, leaning back against the couch. “Damn it...she acts like this is easy for me...”

Brian shook his head. “Man, she just doesn’t understand. Hell, I don’t think any of us does.”

Matt grunted, effectively ending the conversation before it really got started. There was silence for a moment.

Then the guitarist leaned over to give him a man hug then sat back, cracking a grin. “Well, anyway...how’re you, man?”

Matt lifted his shoulders again. “Can’t complain.”

“No?”

“Nope. Life’s pretty damn sweet.” Matt forced a smile, his mind a million miles away. Brian narrowed his eyes on the singer’s face, but before he could argue the fact, the doorbell chimed and they heard Zacky’s voice calling out.

“He’s here!”

Matt rolled his eyes and leaned his head back yelling in response, “Yeah! We heard the bell...why don’t you go open the door, you freak!” Inwardly he was grateful for the interruption. He could feel Brian staring at him, probably not convinced by his nonchalant act. Yet, there would be no time for a heart to heart over it, because they could hear Zacky coming down the hall with their guest.

“Hey guys, this is JD.”

Matt and Brian turned their heads to look over the back of the couch. Zacky stood in the large double doorway a grin as wide as the Cheshire cat’s pasted across his face. He couldn’t be any more welcoming than a dog that had been separated from its master for five minutes. Standing next to him, practically towering over the guitarist was a man who could definitely rival Matt in the height and weight category.

The guitar technician that their old friend Walter had highly recommended was nothing like anyone Matt had expected. He was a big, burly man, with cool black eyes, a stern visage, and a thick head of black hair, which stuck up in a haphazard manner.

“JD?” Brian spoke up, lifting one eyebrow. Matt frowned slightly a niggling thought at the back of his mind; but, he made no comment as the big man smirked.

“Jason Denmore.” JD tipped two fingers to his forehead in a salute.

Zacky was still grinning as he said, “Guitar tech extraordinaire.”

Brian snorted. Matt’s eyes narrowed, a strange feeling stirring in his gut, joining that lone thought. He clenched a fist on top of his left knee then allowed it to relax. Yet, the feeling didn’t go away. He liked to think he was a good judge of character, and even though the guy had barely walked into the house, Matt sensed that he was not exactly who he said he was.

He wasn’t given time to ponder that, though, as Zacky was asking him a question. He blinked at his friend.

“What?”

Zacky rolled his eyes. “I said you want to show him what we’ve planned so far?”

Matt rubbed at his cheek. “Yeah, sure.” He looked over at Brian. “You got your pad?”

Brian nodded, reaching into a bag that was propped at his feet. Pulling a worn notepad from its depths, he turned to look at JD.

“Find a seat. And take a look at this.” He held out the pad. JD took possession of it as he sank down on the chair Michelle had previously occupied. Matt’s brow furrowed as he noted, vaguely, that JD being heavier, would leave a bigger indent in the leather chair. He observed, as casually as he could manage, JD settle back into the seat and lift the notepad to eye level. His black eyes slitting as he scanned the document. Matt kept up the surveillance from the corners of his eyes trying not to make it too obvious. Brian and Zacky of course were engrossed in the tech for different reasons, and the three men began to converse over the notes the guitarists had made about the band’s upcoming album. Leaving Matt to just listen and watch.

Matt felt left out on the one hand, but on the other he was thankful because it allowed his mind to focus on other things. Valary was of course top of his list of things to ponder. He could still see the pained expression that she had been sporting as he’d walked out on her. Part of him felt terrible for leaving her there without explaining things. But, the rest of him just wasn’t ready to deal with the whole situation.

Buying her had been a huge commitment on his part, even more so than if she had been a girlfriend he was going to marry one day. Because with marriage the onus was on both partners to keep the relationship working. But theirs was an unbalanced relationship. They weren’t partners. Partners meant that each was in an equal position. Matt and Valary were far from being equals. However, the reason he had purchased her...well, he wasn’t ready to front on that particular point. Not to her, not to himself, even.

He shifted on his seat, eyes flickering up from his absent staring game with the floor. He blinked once as he realised that JD was staring at him. There was a knowing look in the other man’s eyes, as if they could look right into his soul, his mind. Matt frowned faintly. JD’s lips twitched as if he wanted to say something but then Zacky got his attention and he was once again drawn into a discussion about amps and guitar technique.

Matt muttered to himself, pushing up from his seat. Zacky glanced up at him.

“Where you going?”

“Getting a drink...want anything?”

Zacky rolled his eyes. Brian laughed. “Whatever’s in the fridge, Shads.” He looked at JD. “Want anything?”

“Got some juice?”

Matt shrugged, “I’ll have a look.” He turned and walked out of the living room. Michelle was in the kitchen hands buried in a bowl of flour. She glanced up at him as he entered.

“Why didn’t you bring Val with you?”

Matt scowled at her question, but didn’t answer as he went to the fridge, opening the door and staring intently inside. The sound of her hands leaving the bowl reached his ears, and then she was standing right next to him, flour sprinkling all over the floor at their feet.

“Matt, answer my question.”

He grabbed a couple of bottles of Jack, and a small one of orange juice, popping the lids, before shooting a hard glare at Michelle.

“What do you want me to say?” His voice was rough.

“Why isn’t she here?” Michelle’s gaze narrowed suspiciously. “You haven’t done something to her? Lost your temper?”

Matt stalked over the tiles to the bench, placing the bottles on the granite surface before turning to face her. He worked his jaw for a moment, while trying to formulate a response. Michelle stood opposite him her lips drawn together in a tight line.

Matt sighed. “She didn’t want to come.” Not exactly true, but he didn’t feel up to explaining what was really going on. Well, that wasn’t true at all. He’d told her to stay while he went out. But, he had every right. He was her Master. Not that he was even really consciously thinking of that. He met Michelle’s stare gauging her reception of his statement.

She sighed, shaking her head. “I don’t believe you.”

He grunted. “Whatever.” Grabbing the bottles he left the kitchen going back to join the men.

Brian looked up as he walked in. “Hey, JD says he can start straight up tomorrow.”

Matt cocked an eyebrow as he handed the drinks to them; JD nodded his head in thanks as he took a long pull from the bottle of OJ. Matt gave a quick smile then looked at Brian.

“I haven’t told Dad we’re gonna be crashing his place this week.” The guys did the initial demo recordings in the Sanders’ garage, which had been converted into a mini-studio set up back in the early days. They had decided to return there for their next album, because they always worked well there. Matt’s parents were always good company too.

“Your studio is at your parents’ place?” JD gave Matt a sideways glance, curiosity evident in his eyes.

“Yeah. We do all our prepping there. It’s kind of cozy...but, it’ll do, until we have to go do the final product.” Matt parked his ass back next to Brian, looking over at JD with a thoughtful expression. That thought he’d had before rose up again, flaring uncomfortably in his mind, and causing the skin at the back of his neck to tighten. “So, it probably won’t be super exciting for you, just yet.” Matt kept his tone light, not wanting to reveal his suspicion.

JD just nodded, crossing thick arms over his chest. Matt had a vague thought that JD was not someone he would want to tangle with. Shaking his head, he pegged the big male with a curious look.

“So? Who else have you worked with?”

JD shifted on his seat, rubbing at his wrist before answering. “You’d be the first actually. I was sort of helping out a friend’s gig on the side of my other job. He told me I should get into the tech thing for money. Said I was good at it.” He shrugged. “He’s always got good advice and considering my other job’s gotten quiet. Thought I’d follow through.”

Brian spoke up then, listening into their conversation. “What’s your other job?”

Matt leaned forward just as interested as his band mate. Perhaps whatever JD revealed would explain the vibes he was getting from him.

JD’s brow furrowed slightly, his eyes holding a shadowed look. “I don’t...like to talk about it.” He laughed darkly. “I mean...it’s not illegal, or some shit. It’s just...it’s a way to get money.” He tightened his arms over his chest, muscles swelling from the slight strain. Then he relaxed them, the smile becoming softer around the edges.

“It’s a depressing job. But, I feel like I have to do it. I guess I just have a Good Samaritan complex.” He coughed gruffly, clearing his throat. “Anyway. If this guitar tech thing works out, I might switch to doing this permanently.”

Brian smiled broadly, “Well, I can say we’re glad you’ve decided to do this. Right, Shads?” He looked over at Matt. Matt nodded absently in agreement, his mind still picking at what JD had said. None of it really explained what Matt was feeling, in fact it just added to the confusion. Still, he couldn’t really expect to learn every little thing about the guy when he’d just met him.

Perhaps over the many long days of recording the album he would get to know him better and it would all become a lot clearer? He could only hope that would be the case. He didn’t like not being sure of people.

Stretching, he looked across to his friends. Zacky had finished his beer; Brian was closing up his notebook. They both looked over at him. He forced a smile their way, as he rolled his head on his neck.

“Damn, I’m stiff.” Matt stood, rubbing at the back of his neck.

Brian snorted, standing as well. “You need to loosen up, buddy. I know exactly what you need.”

“Yeah, get some Jack into your system,” Zacky laughed, levering his body out of his chair. Matt rolled his eyes at the other guitarist.

“Jack does Jack-all for me.” He shoved a hand in his pocket reaching for the keys to his bike. “Goose works better for me.” He started to head for the kitchen. But then he caught JD watching him, and getting to his feet. He paused, looking back.

JD blinked, pulling a baseball cap from his back pocket, jamming it onto his head as he asked, “Thinking of going somewhere to drink?”

Matt smirked faintly. “Yeah, we’ll go downtown. Shoot some pool, have a drink.” Get to know each other better, and make sure this working partnership will actually work, Matt added silently in his head.

Without waiting for a response from the other man, he cast a quick look at his watch as he left the living room. He had a couple of hours, and then he’d head home, back to Val. But, first he wanted to pick JD’s brain a little more.

Is there more to this JD than meets the eye? Sure as hell feels like he's not just a straight up guitar tech. I get the impression he's been "sent".

Maybe You'll have to wait and see.

~~~~


Part Eighteen - “It’s none of my business.”

“Val! I’m home!”

The front door opens then shuts. I hear Matt’s heavy footsteps approaching our room. Glancing over at the clock, I register the time. It’s late. He obviously decided to go out for a drink with the guys before coming home. I bite my lip and shuffle about on the bed where I’ve basically been laying ever since he left earlier.

I’d managed to compose myself after I don’t know how long I spent crying. But, I no longer feel like tearing up, for now at least.

Matt appears in the doorway and frowns at me.

“What are you doing?”

Lifting my head, I meet his sharp look. Something’s got him on edge. I just hope he still isn’t stewing over our conversation. Or that he’s angry with me for some reason. I don’t think I could handle it if that were the case. He’s in a mood, though; so, answering him quick would probably be the best decision to make, right now.

“Um, nothing, Master. Just...laying here.”

Matt taps the fingers of his left hand against the wooden frame. His lips draw together in a thin lie, before relaxing a little. “You know what time it is?” His voice is toneless.

I nod and swing my legs off the bed, planting my feet on the floor. “Yes, Master. Uh...what do you feel like eating?”

His lips twitch and his gaze narrows. I tremble a little beneath his hard stare. But, I manage to keep composed, awaiting his answer. He gives a shake of his head.

“Don’t mind. As long as it’s edible.”

That could be anything at all. My heart starts racing. In my experience, when a master tells a slave he ‘doesn’t mind’ that, in actual fact, means the slave had better read her master’s mind and get him the only thing he really wants to eat and that she’d better not screw up or she’ll regret it, big time. That has been my experience in all other cases, with all my previous owners. The number of times I’ve been beaten because I couldn’t read my master’s mind...it’s almost criminal.

Therefore, hearing that from Matt is unsettling. He has never raised a hand to hit me or anything like that. Usually if he gets angry with me he relies on proximity and voice to acquire my submission and/or contrition. I mean, jeeze, look at the man, he just has to enter a room and scowl, and that’s enough to scare me.

Still, even after several months as his slave, he still manages to toss curve-balls into the mix and completely throw me off guard. Hopefully, he is nothing like my former owners in this regard, otherwise I’m in a bind. Because, I can never get it right.

Moving to the door, I hesitate. Matt’s standing such that he’s blocking my exit. The only way I’ll get past is if I push between his big body and the doorframe. That won’t be easy. He’s as solid as a brick wall. And, this close, I can see how tense he is. But, I also notice the worry lines on his forehead. It’s then that I realise he’s not angry. No, something is confusing him, and it has nothing to do with me.

Pausing, I lift my gaze to his, daring to meet his eyes. Normally, I would just mutter an ‘excuse me, Master’ and he would let me pass. But the expression on his face, it bothers me. I want to help ease him, if he’ll let me.

“Master?” I decide to take the plunge.

“Hmmm?” Matt lifts an eyebrow. I rub my hands over my arms.

“Is everything okay? You look worried?”

He folds his arms, shifting so the doorjamb is between his shoulder blades. Not that it makes it any easier for me to get past him, or anything. His posture screams ‘keep out of it’. I lower my eyes, hunching up my shoulders.

“I’m sorry; it’s none of my business. I’ll...uh, just go and get dinner ready...” I squeeze past him making sure I don’t meet his eyes, even as our bodies brush tight against each other. As I’m about to duck down the hall, Matt stops me, the tips of his fingers resting against my left forearm.

“Val.” His voice sounds raspier than usual.

I turn my eyes up to his slowly. He scrunches up his face, looking, for all the world, like a little boy who is contemplating the wonders of the universe. He wants to say something; I can see it in the light of his eyes, in the tightening of his lips. But he says nothing, just stares at me.

After a moment, a sigh escapes him and he jerks his chin down the hallway. “Go on. I’ll join you in a few.”

My lips part slightly, as if I have something to say, but then I seal them and head for the kitchen without another word.

* * * * *

“This is really good.”

I look up from the half-empty bowl of spaghetti that I’m absently dragging my fork around in. The metal tines tinkle against the porcelain bowl. Matt smiles at me a long strand of pasta dangling from his mouth. He looks comical, and I giggle a little. In response he flashes his signature dimpled grin, before slurping the spag into his mouth, the very end flicking and spraying a tiny bit of sauce over his top lip.

I laugh outright. He chuckles, swallowing. I see the muscles in his throat flexing as he does.

I flush and lower my eyes back to my bowl, murmuring in a low voice, “I’m glad you like it, Master...it’s the only thing I’m good at cooking.”

There’s quiet for a moment then Matt scoffs, “Yeah right. What was that rice dish you made the other night?”

My cheeks are really burning now. The only reason I can cook alright is because I used to snatch recipes from magazines lying around my former owners’ kitchens. Mainly Giovanni’s, though. For some reason he was actually quite a good cook. I think he might have been a chef in another life. I shake my head; I can’t really answer the question.

Matt sighs, but doesn’t press, which I’m grateful for. Sometimes, I just can’t find words, and I feel terrible if I can’t explain myself. Luckily, he doesn’t seem to mind and just let’s it slide.

I finish my pasta, keeping my gaze fixed on my food. I can hear Matt polishing off his share, his cutlery clinking as he rests them in his obviously empty bowl. He clears his throat several times. I look at him, head tilted. His brow creases as he leans back against his chair. The wood groans in protest as he settles his weight into the frame.

He’s preparing himself to say something; I see the thoughts moving in his eyes. Remaining silent, I wait. He’ll start talking when he’s ready. I mean, I am curious to know what he has to say, but I will never prompt him. It isn’t my place. And, it doesn’t really matter what it is he’s going to say, either.

I enjoy listening about his day, really. If it is that he’s going to talk about. Yes, part of me hopes that maybe he’ll broach the subject of our earlier conversation. But, that’s such a personal, intimate topic that it makes me a little uncomfortable, particularly because I don’t know how he feels about me. Like how he honestly feels. Because, as I keep mentioning, he does care...

“Met the new tech today.” Matt’s voice cuts off my contemplation. I note the casual tone. Though he’s frowning again, which can only mean something is bothering him. This has been evident ever since he came home.

“Yeah?”

Matt nods lips twisting. “Yeah, he’s interesting. I can’t figure him out though. The guys are into him. But, I don’t know.” He shrugs. “Guess I’ll get to know him better as we do the album record.”

He tightens his arms across his chest. Then he looks me directly in the eye. “I want you to meet him.” No explanation why, but I don’t expect one.

He continues. “Next time I go to Syn’s I’m taking you with me.” He smirks. “Need to get you out of the house. Shopping with your sister is one thing, but hanging with me and the boys somewhere other than here...you need to get used to that.”

He leans forward against the table and reaches over it for my left hand. He takes it gently in his own, enveloping it. I tremble at the warmth of his touch. His hand is huge next to my slender appendage. He could so easily break my bones, but he’s always so gentle with me.

I stare at the big veins standing out on the back of his hand. With a tentative touch, I trace my thumb along one; Matt shivers and shifts his grip, tightening it on mine.

“Val,” his voice is firm, “have you thought any about what I asked you before?”

I purse my lips at the change of topic, confusion settling in my mind. “What do you mean, Master?”

Matt breathes out, the sound rough. “Why do you think I bought you?”

I try to focus on him, but the question unsettles me. I couldn’t answer it before, and I don’t really think I can answer it. I’m not good at figuring out the motives of people. Passing strange, considering as a slave I should be good at that. Shaking my head hard, I tug at his hand. He doesn’t let go.

“Valary.”

“I don’t know!” I blurt out frustration obvious in the high pitched lift at the end. Matt raises his eyebrows at my outburst. I shiver and drop my forehead against the table and whisper in a hoarse undertone, “I don’t know, Master...I’m sorry...”

Matt grimaces, squeezing my hand, his touch tender. “Don’t be. You have nothing to be sorry for. If you don’t know, then you don’t know. I was just wondering.”

There’s something he’s not saying. His voice is tempered, careful, as if he’s refraining from telling me what he’s really thinking. But, I don’t mention my observation; I’m too embarrassed about my little outburst to even consider anything else.

Quiet falls around us, tense, and uncertain, both of us busy trying to think of some way to fill the silence. Matt keeps his hand around mine, stroking the pad of his thumb against the pulse point on my wrist. I observe the slow motion as if it’s the most interesting thing I’ve ever seen. Anything to not have to think about my emotions, or his.

Time passes, the patter of Bella’s claws on the outside porch, the breeze whistling through the branches of the trees, the waves on the shoreline, our soft breaths. There is nothing else between us, for now, just the calm.

I continue to watch as Matt rubs his thumb against my skin, in steady strokes. The sensation of the calloused pad sends soft tingles along my arm. The feeling is almost sensual, even though his action is extremely casual. But then again, maybe he wants something from me and is just building up to the asking. Hah. He doesn’t have to ask, he can just order me to bed, if he wants.

Peeking up at him, I try to decipher his expression. He catches my eye and the corners of his lips twitch into a tiny smile.

“Yes, Val?”

Eyes darting to the side, I glance at our empty bowls. “Uh...I should clean up.”

Matt sits back, finally releasing his grip, crossing his arms over his chest. “So you should.”

I start to stand up.

“Valary...uh...” He clears his throat, causing me to halt and look at him. “Michelle was asking about you.”

Wrinkling the bridge of my nose, I ask, “What did she say?”

Matt shakes his head, looking away from me. But, he does give me an answer. “She wanted to know why I didn’t bring you with me.”

I bite at my lip. “What did you tell her?”

Matt brings his eyes back to mine, his brow tight, and his eyes too bright. He doesn’t speak for a moment. I occupy myself by gathering the plates and heading for the sink to wash them. He remains at the table, leaning his elbows against the surface, obviously mulling over an answer. Either that or he’s not going to tell me and is just waiting for me to clear up.

Once I’m done I turn to look at him. He tilts his head to return my gaze.

“I lied to her.” Matt grimaces like he has a bad taste in his mouth. “It’s way too personal, it’s just...none of her business.”

“Oh.”

Lowering my eyes, I stand by the kitchen bench not sure what I should do now. Scraping on the floor signals that Matt is getting up from the table. He moves across the floor and stops in front of me. I lift my eyes up his length, stopping just before I reach his gaze.

Matt sighs, the sound causing my chest to tighten. “Well, I didn’t think you’d appreciate me telling her about our discussion.”

I manage a small smile at his statement. He’s right; I don’t really want anyone other than Matt knowing what goes on behind closed doors. I mean if we wanted everyone to know, we could just have these conversations when they’re around. But, considering we don’t...

“Thank you, Master.”

Matt smiles then rakes his fingers through his shaggy hair. “Right. It’s still early, so you can go write in your journal. I need to check my emails.”

I glance askance at him. He doesn’t usually need to tell me to write about my day. I’ve gotten into the habit of penning a few lines every night before we go to bed. He never tells me if he needs to check his mail, either. Something is off.

Well, maybe there’s nothing wrong, but something is occupying his mind that wasn’t before. Then considering he keeps asking me why I think he bought me, perhaps he’s trying to avoid telling me himself, and is deliberately making up excuses to not have to deal with the issue. With his emotions.

Nodding, I let him take hold of my elbow and steer me from the kitchen to our room. He releases his grasp motioning with a tilt of his head for me to go in. I step into the room, but look at him. Matt gives a slight shake of his head as if he is answering a question that I’ve not asked.

“Gimme a few.”

He turns and heads for the study. I, sighing, turn and go to the bed, retrieving my journal from Matt’s night stand. Settling on my place on the bed I open to the next blank page and begin writing.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Okay, this is a little random, but. Y’know, Master, I always wondered why people liked having pets. All of my masters prior to you coming into my life had had animals in their households. Not including me of course. Yes, I know that sounds kind of crass, but I was barely treated any better than a dog in the majority of cases. I was used to it, though. But, I always envied the coveted position that their pets had.

There was this one guy, he had a poodle, pampered it no end, disgusting really. I mean, he treated it more like a woman than he did me. Strange person...but, hopefully I’m well shot of people like that...

Anyway, watching Bella today, made me think of all that. She kept me company today while you were out. Yeah, I let her inside; please don’t be pissed about that. I was lonely...and I think she was too. So, yeah...I let her in.

She was WHINING! Okay? I wasn’t going to put up with that. It was giving me a headache. I mean, I have to put up with a lot of things; it’s what I have to do, right? Well, okay...I don’t mind it since being with you, but with my previous owners, I had to ‘put up with it’. But, anyway, she sounded like a child who had been left alone by her parents...

Great. No, I’m not crying, Master. I don’t think I’ve cried about that, not since I was really little. I can’t ever remember being little.

Actually, that’s kind of a lie. Only kind of. I wouldn’t lie to you. I used to lie all the time. Saved my skin most times. Because most of my other...well they weren’t really very perceptive. Probably because they didn’t cared about me. Anyway, I do remember some things about when I was a kid. A very happy time, actually. I think I remember the feeling more than anything, being surrounded by people who cared...and loved me. Family, I guess. Friends, maybe.

You know, when Michelle and I went shopping the other day...she told me about when she first got with Brian. Said that was a happy time for her. Even though she said that you were always trying to thwart her chances of being with him, at the time. I didn’t get that. She told me it was because you were jealous of what they had. Not that it’s any of my business [I feel like I’ve been saying that a lot...] so don’t think I was prying into your personal life, or anything. It’s just I’ve never had anyone to talk to, about random shit like that. Like, like sisters should do, right?

I can’t talk about anything personal with her, though. You’ll be the first person I share anything with. Not just because you’re my Master or anything, but...I don’t really feel comfortable telling her, because I don’t know if she’d understand, or not. So, if I ever feel like telling about all the stuff that’s happened in my life, the good and the bad, you’ll be the first to hear about it. And probably the only person I’ll ever confide in...

I’m rambling here, aren’t I? I guess that’s because I don’t know how to deal with the way you’re acting around me. There. I said it. It bothers me, Master because it makes me feel like I’ve done something wrong. Which I know I haven’t, have I? I mean, let’s forget about the Guild and everything...this is about us, right? I mean sure, we can’t forget...forget them. But, maybe we could try sorting things out to make it easier.

Anyway, I don’t know what else to write, you’ll probably be finished reading emails now...and it’s getting really dark now. And I’m tired. Even though I didn’t really do anything tiring today. Did a bit of cleaning...things were a bit dusty. Made some lunch for you to take tomorrow...if you’re going to the studio...I guess after what you said at dinner you might be taking me too. But, I guess I’ll have to wait.

So, here is me signing off...

Hmmm, more intrigue. Dunno where this is headed, which is pretty cool. I am really getting into the idea of Val writing messages to Matt, the stuff she just can't say to his face, although I get the feeling it's gonna bite them both in the ass very soon...if, say, someone from The Guild finds her journal.

Well, let's hope that doesn't happen eh?

~~~~


Part Nineteen

Jimmy is the funniest guy I’ve ever met. I just thought I’d tell you that. Every time I encounter the drummer, who is one of Matt’s closest friends, he’s always making everyone crack up. He knows countless jokes and one-liners that always, always, get everyone cracking up so hard you’d think an explosion was set off. Or perhaps just one of those fart-producers. Jimmy has a few of them lying around. Even here at Matt’s parents place.

We’ve already been here five minutes and Jimmy’s already pulling pranks on people. He just got done telling Matt his parents have left and aren’t coming back, when Mr Sanders senior pokes his head out of the garage and waves a spanner at us. That’s one busted. Jimmy just shrugs and wanders into the garage, which is actually where the guys have set up their studio.

It’s jam packed with amps, guitars, Jimmy’s first serious drum kit, ProTools rig and an assortment of gear I have no idea what they are. Not that I need to know, all I need to know is that the band is pretty awesome and not to get in the way when they’re working. Yeah, totally not connected, obviously.

I’m standing outside by Matt’s bike, arms linked together across my breasts. Having never been here before, I’m a little nervous. I can see Matt talking with his Dad, obviously about me, because he nods toward me several times. Straining, I can almost hear what they’re saying; I lean forward more.

“You spying on ‘em, Val?”

I jerk around fast. Jimmy is leaning against the handlebars of Matt’s bike, a cheeky grin on his face. Blinking at him I find I can’t answer. My mouth just hangs open in a helpless gesture. He chuckles, not in an unkind manner.

“You want to come inside and wait for him?”

Shaking my head, I find my voice, “No thank you, I’d better just stay here.”

Jimmy smiles faintly, before nodding and heading back toward the garage. “See you in there, then.” His voice disappears as he does.

I look back across to Matt. He’s still with his Dad but he’s now looking directly at me. I tilt my head. He smiles and motions for me to join them. Gripping my elbows, I walk over to stand next to him. Matt rests a hand on my shoulder while glancing at his father.

“Dad, I want you to meet Valary.” Matt looks to me. “Val, this is my dad.”

Lifting my gaze, I find myself peering into warm hazel eyes that are identical to Matt’s. His father smiles at me, a soft expression which lights up his whole face.

“Well, hello there, dear. I’m Gary.” He smiles more. “Matt’s told me, and his mom, a lot about you.” He holds a hand out to me. I hesitate, glancing toward Matt. He inclines his head encouragingly toward me. I take Gary’s hand; he squeezes mine in a gentle grasp.

I bite my lip, before saying, “It’s nice to meet you, sir.”

Gary quirks his eyebrows at me. Matt gives a low chuckle. His father shoots a sharp look at him. Matt shrugs and turns away, leaving me with his father. I blink then look at him.

Gary sighs, “Just call me whatever you’re comfortable with, Valary. But, I wouldn’t mind if you called me ‘Gary’.” It is my name.”

I nod a little, feeling somewhat tongue-tied. He smiles at me, a warm expression. Then he motions toward the studio.

“Go join them. You’ll enjoy yourself. They are very good at what they do.”

I nod again, as he nudges me through the doorway. Matt looks up from where he’s planted himself in front of a large computer monitor. He smiles and grabs a stool, pulling it next to him, and patting a hand on it.

“C’mere, Val. Sit.”

Carefully making my way to his side, I slide down onto the stool and tuck my feet beneath it. He smiles at me then turns his head to his other side where Jimmy has sat himself on a swivel stool. He must use it for when he’s behind the drums. Jimmy waggles his eyebrows.

“So, Matt, is that tech coming today? I want to meet him.”

I tilt my head. Matt shoots a look at me then answers his friend, “Yeah, Brian says he’ll be here a little later.” I lean my head on his shoulder, listening as he and Jimmy talk. The drummer is still wiggling his eyebrows, one eye looking directly at me. I try not to giggle, because Matt is still talking.

“I’m not really sure about him. He strikes me as a little...I don’t know...odd.”

Jimmy laughs, “You’ve only met him once, Matt.”

Matt shrugs, acting all nonchalant; but, I sense tension beneath his cool facade. Jimmy just gives him a level look, then rolls his eyes and pushes himself around to a position at his drums. Matt sighs and absently drapes an arm around my shoulders, squeezing a little. Leaning more against him, I tuck my head down and nuzzle into his shoulder. He smiles at me as he taps his foot on the floor.

Jimmy picks ups his sticks and does a roll across the heads, before glancing toward us and grinning.

“By the way, he can’t be odd.”

Matt scratches at his cheek. “What?”

Jimmy chuckles. “He can’t be odd...because I am.”

I lift my head to give him a curious look; he catches my gaze, winking at me.

“Do you agree, Val?”

Before I can answer, Matt says, gruffly, “You’re a crazy motherfucker, Rev. You’re not odd. Odd is something you’d call an uncle...”

“No,” Jimmy retorts, “the word you’re looking for is ‘eccentric’. An eccentric uncle.”

He tosses a stick up in the air and then catches it, bringing it crashing down on a ride hat. I try to stifle a giggle; Matt picks up on it and squeezes his arm around me more. I peek up at him. His lips curve in a soft smile. I flush and look away a part of me feeling silly at my behaviour, but another still uncertain about everything that is between us.

Matt still hasn’t said anything about...well just about everything. He’s just cool, calm...casual. He hasn’t really spoken much since yesterday, just necessary communication. And, it’s still bothering me. Then again, he’s obviously preoccupied with the band and the album record, so I can’t really complain. I’m not the only thing in his life he needs to deal with.

Matt scoffs, “You’d be an eccentric uncle.”

Jimmy gets this thoughtful expression on his face as he absently taps the plastic tip of his stick against his top teeth. I tilt my head at him. He grins my way then swings around on his stool letting out a loud whoop, the sound echoing in the relatively small space. Matt shakes his head and shifts round so he’s facing the computer.

“Dumbass,” he mumbles half under his breath.

Brian walks in then and cocks an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest. I notice the bulge of his biceps and flush pink as he catches me looking. He lifts an eyebrow at me, lips twitching before he shoots a mock glare at Matt.

“Who you calling a dumbass, Shads?”

Matt leans back on his chair, having moved his arm from my shoulders and chuckles low. “You’re best buddy, Bri.” He nods toward Jimmy, who is still spinning on his stool.

Brian looks over, just as the drummer comes to a halt and pretends to sway wildly. He rolls his eyes and goes to stand next to him.

“Rev...for fucks sake...”

Jimmy crosses his eyes, grinning like a madman. “Yeah?”

Brian just shakes his head and looks back over at us. “Denmore’s on his way over. Wanted to have a look at some gear first.”

I feel Matt tense up at the mention of the tech, and glance at him.

“Master?” I whisper. He shakes his head at me, not smiling. I bite my bottom lip before placing a hand on his arm, a soft touch, barely noticeable. His jaw tightens the muscle bulging in a sign that he is becoming irritated. I drop my hand and shift around on my stool.

Jimmy catches what’s going on and scowls. “Oi, what’s got up your ass?”

“Hmmm?” Matt glances toward the drummer.

Jimmy points his stick at him, lips twitching in vague amusement. “I said: What’s up your-”

“I know what you said. What’s it to you?” There’s an edge to Matt’s voice. Jimmy isn’t fazed though and just gives another of his laconic grins.

Hiding a smile, I turn away to look around the studio. Zacky waltzes in at the same moment as my eyes settle on the doorway. Full of life and energetic as ever, the guitarist flops over a pair of amps and waves toward us.

“Hey, JD just arrived...he’s chatting up your dad, Shads.”

Matt rolls his eyes and, hands gripping the armrests, pushes up out of his chair. I look up at him; he doesn’t meet my gaze. Instead, he focuses his attention on the doorway, pausing before striding out of the studio. Zacky turns to follow him; Jimmy springs up and sprints out after them. I frown, wondering whether I should follow, but I don’t get a chance as Brian flops in the chair beside me.

“Hey, Val. What’s going on between you two?”

I tear my eyes from the backs of the other men and turn to look at him. “Pardon?”

Brian’s eyes are soft, warm, a hint of concern in their depths. “You and Matt? What’s going on?”

Pursing my lips, I wonder where he’s coming from. Unless Michelle said something to him, I can’t fathom why he would even care. Or why he would even ask. He lifts an eyebrow, his expression gentle.

“Val? You can talk to me. I won’t say shit.”

My cheeks flush, and I lower my eyes, unable to meet his tender gaze. “Nothing’s going on...”

“Bullshit. He’s been acting fucking weird lately.” Brian’s face is tight; the angular lines of his jaw and cheekbones appear to stand out more than usual. I shake my head. He grimaces. “Chelle notices it too...”

Like that makes me any less reluctant to talk about it. I duck my head down more. Hoping he’ll take the hint, I wait for him to move away. But he doesn’t. Instead, he grasps the edge of my stool and tugs me closer to him. I let out a soft gasp and glance up into his eyes. They’re deep and dark, filling with a swirling hue of seriousness.

“Valary, don’t pull this shit. You’re obviously stewing over some shit that’s going on between you, and it’s not healthy.”

Trembling, I try to pull back, but he’s holding onto the stool in a tight grip.

“Brian,” I swallow hard on his name. “Brian, please...just leave it alone...it’s nothing...”

His eyes narrow into slits, so what gleams between his lashes is almost black. “Bull-fucking-shit. It’s not nothing. If it were nothing, you wouldn’t be avoiding looking at me.”

Damn him. Damn him for being right. I shiver, tucking my chin into my chest. My heart is aching and a heavy sensation settles in the pit of my stomach.

“Please...” I whisper. “Please...just...just leave it...”

But Brian won’t back down. “Valary...”

Something inside me snaps, and I jerk away from him, raising my voice to get through to him, “It’s none of your business okay, so just leave it alone! Leave me alone...” My last words peter off in a pathetic whimper and I crumple into myself, feeling as if my world is crumbling down around me.

Brian gets this anxious look on his face and I feel his hands on my shoulders, attempting to soothe me. But, I don’t respond, my breaths escaping in desperate sobs.

“Oi? What the fuck?” Matt’s deep voice registers somewhere in the depth of my subconscious, but I don’t heed it, just rocking on the stool, clutching myself around my waist.

Voices war around me, as Matt and Brian talk over me. I don’t hear anything they say, too wrapped up in my emotional wave. Next thing, I feel strong, warm palms grasping my upper arms, pulling me into a hard embrace. I cling to the soft, worn cotton of Matt’s top, nuzzling into it; a patch of moisture spreading from where my face rests.

Matt moves one hand around a spot at the small of my back, murmuring soft, reassuring words to me. I tremble against him, and then shiver as Brian begins berating him over my head. I tune in then, listening to every word.

“You have some fucking nerve, Matt.” The guitarist’s voice is low, tense. “You are so fucking dense. You can’t even cop to the way you feel.”

Matt’s arms tighten around me, but he says nothing to defend himself against Brian’s tirade. Part of me wishes he would, but another is afraid of what I might hear. What I might find out. My heart feels as if it wants to explode out of my chest, from the fear of the unknown.

Brian goes on, getting more wound up at each word. “I mean how fucking hard is it to say you care? How fucking hard is it to cop to the fact that you might feel something for her? I mean, fuck...look at her, man? You’re lucky to have her...she’s lucky to have you.” He pauses for just a single breath before launching onwards. “You should tell her how you feel, ‘cause it’s pretty damn obvious, to me at least, that you’re totally fucking mad keen on her.”

I peek up, seeing a hard expression ghost over Matt’s face, but before he can answer, a voice speaks up from the door to the studio.

“Because he knows he can’t.”

I swing my head around as much as I can with Matt holding me. Brian glowers toward the entrance. Matt looks over too. I can’t see who is standing there because Matt’s big body is shielding me from view. But, I recognise the person’s voice and I can feel my blood freeze. That man from the mall...but...it can’t be? His name was something Douglas...not Denmore...right? Right...?

Matt, interrupting my thought, growls, “What the hell do you know, Denmore?”

I try to peer around his body, but he shifts blocking my view. So, I lean into him and just listen.

“What do I know?” There is a hint of amusement in his voice, deep, calculating. “That would be telling, and I’m not here for that. I was just making an observation.”

I feel Matt tense even more than earlier. “Well, keep out of something that doesn’t fucking concern you.”

Brian adds, in a stiff tone, “Yeah, ‘cause if you can’t we’ll have to tell Walter this won’t work. And we’d hate to have him think maybe his judgement isn’t so hot.”

There’s an uncomfortable silence, then the guy speaks in a solemn tone, “Walter doesn’t know everything about me, but don’t make judgements on face value. I’m pretty serious about my work. And I want this to work out.”

Matt doesn’t relax. But, Brian sighs and I see him nodding from the corner of my eye.

“Right...well, come in. We’d better get to work.” He turns to sit in front of the computer. Zacky and Jimmy join him.

Before I can protest, Matt shuffles me into a corner where I am hidden from view, and then he parks his ass on a stool in front of me. I can’t see over his back, but more importantly, I suppose, I can’t be seen. All I can do is listen, and I do so as the guy walks in and joins Brian by the computer, I assume, because I hear their voices as they begin to discuss the tracks.

Sighing, I lean against Matt’s back and close my eyes. Nothing to do but wait...maybe after they finish Matt will introduce me, but then again judging by how antsy he seems about the guy...maybe not...

I’ll just have to wait and see...

Dearest writer,

I just thought that I would pop onto this one too, and say that I am eager for updates.. and "HIII!" -hops up and down and waves eagerly- ^__^

That is all.

Love, your enthusiastic reader.

I KNEW IT!!!! There's more to that tech than meets the eye *whistles the Transformers theme music* Guitar Tech...Guild spy in disguise! (what? that worked in my head!)

Hehehe, poor Val, I do hope Matt is able to admit to his feelings soon, but I'm worried what will happen with The Guild if he does.

Argh! Update soon please!

I think that worked there, as well Ciara

Last update for today. Lol.

~~~~~


Part Twenty

“Valary...Valary...Valary...Vaal...wake up!”

Someone is poking me in the side of my head. I groan in protest, rolling over, wishing they’d just let me alone, I’m very comfortable here in...thud.

“Hey...don’t fall off the stool, Valary...”

Too late. I blink and find myself staring up into Jimmy’s stunning blue gaze. “Uh...hi? What happened?”

Jimmy smirks, not unkindly. “You fell asleep back here...getting bored, already?” He tilts his head at me, and then makes to poke me again. I hold my hands up and back into the corner.

“Stop, please...I’m awake...” A soft giggle slips past my lips. He grins at me, blue eyes sparkling.

“Good. ‘Cause someone wants to meet you.”

I frown; if he means the guitar tech, I’m not really sure I want to put myself anywhere near him. I still have this niggling thought that he is the same guy from the mall, and if he is then I don’t know whether that should scare me, or not. I don’t easily trust people...particularly if they seem suspicious. Like Jason Denmore. If that’s even his real name.

Jimmy waves his hand in front of my face, drawing my attention back to him. “Val, you still with me?”

“Yeah, sorry...just thinking...”

“Well, stop thinking and come meet Denny.”

Gee that was quick...he’s already got a nickname for him... “Uh...well does...”

“Does Matt know? Yeah, he’s over with him. Don’t worry, he’s not gonna bite you.” Jimmy leans in close, squinting at me, and then it’s as if something seems to dawn on him. “Hey, you’re not scared are you? We’re all here, we’d never let anything happen. I mean, you heard Matt before, right? He’d stick up for you, no fucking worries.”

I look away, biting at my bottom lip. I find I do that a lot these days. After a moment, I give a slight nod.

“Okay...but, uh...why would he want to meet me, anyway?” I know, I’m acting all reluctant, but it’s just a habit, for the sake of self-preservation. It pays to be cautious, and to know what’s going on. Always.

Jimmy rolls his eyes and holds his hand out to me. “Because he’s being friendly.”

Yeah, right. He just wants to be a sticky-beak. But, I guess I should give him a chance. I mean, if Matt’s over there with him, it can’t hurt, can it? But, then Matt doesn’t know that the guy is who I think he is...because he wasn’t at the mall with us. He’s just suspicious because he has some kind of intuition about him. Well, if I go over there...the truth will most likely out. And maybe that will make all of this a lot easier.

I sigh, finally taking hold of Jimmy’s hand. He grins as he tugs me from the corner over to where the guys are lounging in front of the computer. Matt is the first to look up; a tight expression dominates his face. He isn’t comfortable with the situation, but he doesn’t say anything. He just nods to me and glances at the others. Brian lifts a hand; Zacky grins, but I don’t have eyes for them.

Time seems to freeze as my gaze settles upon the man sitting between the two guitarists. Deep black eyes stare at me from beneath the peak of a ball cap. His gaze seems all-knowing as if he can look into my soul and figure me out with a single glance.

Yep. It’s definitely him. I’d recognise those eyes anywhere. I mean, sure...I’ve only met him once, but sometimes it’s the ones you meet just in a single fleeting moment that imprint on your memory the strongest. And, at any rate, his eyes are so damn intense it feels like he’s drilling a hole into you when he focuses his gaze in your direction.

I swallow hard, but he speaks first. “Hey, you’re that girl from the mall. Don’t you have a twin?”

From the corner of my eye I see both Matt and Zacky stiffen, faces darkening. For a second I wonder if they’ve figured it out. The connection. Because I definitely have.

Before I can answer, Matt shifts on his chair and answers for me, “Yeah, she does. What’s it to you?”

A frown flickers across JD’s face as he turns his head toward my master. “I just thought I recognised her. She was with another woman who looked helluva lot like her.” He shrugs, speaking casually. “I was with a buddy of mine, just taking a break from work.”

Matt gives a terse nod, his mouth set hard. “Right. Yeah, she has a twin. Brian’s girl.”

The tech tilts his head, glancing at Brian. Brian lifts a shoulder, but doesn’t speak. JD looks back at Matt, crossing his arms over his chest. I try not to stare. He’s bigger than Matt, which says something, doesn’t it? I don’t know many men who are, y’know...bigger...more powerful looking... Before Matt, I didn’t think anyone could be that muscled. But, obviously, JD tips the scales there. Not that he looks like one of those wrestlers or body builders. He’s just taller, and more built...okay, I should stop thinking about that now...

“Yeah, anyway, I just saw them at the mall. No big deal.” JD rubs a hand against a bicep, before unfolding his arms and leaning forward.

Jimmy, who’s still standing next to me, snorts. “Of course it’s a big deal; it’s always a big deal.”

JD gives the drummer a weird look. Brian lets out a bark of laughter.

“Everything’s a big deal to Jimmy.”

“Very true,” Jimmy chuckles, then walks back over to his drums.

JD smirks, the corners of his lips twitching upward, but he says nothing, just inclines his head toward me tilting his fingers to the peak of his cap. I blink at him in answer. He just smiles more, and then swivels round on his stool back toward the monitors. I stare at his broad back then look at the others. They all have various different expressions on their faces, but it’s Matt I focus on. His eyes are dark, and it’s nothing to do with their colour. Whatever thoughts are going through his mind can’t be pleasant.

He stands pushing back his chair in an abrupt motion then jerks his head at me toward the exit. Brian frowns.

“Where’re you going?”

Matt shakes his head, but says, “Need to talk to Val about something; won’t take long.”

He looks to me then at the door. I get the hint and head for the exit, not arguing and ignoring the curious glances the other guys are giving the both of us. Matt follows me out, dismissing the guys’ questions, telling them just to get on with their work, before joining me outside.

Closing the door over, he approaches coming to a halt in front of me; his eyes stare downwards, one eyebrow lifting a little. I peer up at him, unable to gauge his expression.

“What is it, Master?”

Matt works his jaw for a moment, and then answers, “He’s the guy who gave you that card, isn’t he?” The end of his phrase curls up in question.

Biting my lip, I incline my head to the side, before giving a single nod. Matt sighs, smearing a hand over his face.

“Fuck, what does this mean?” His tone is low, as if he’s speaking more to himself, than to me. I wait, not responding.

He eyes me, face serious. I look away, rubbing at my arms. He reaches out to me; I see the movement from the corner of my eyes. I lean toward him as he strokes a finger down the side of my neck, his touch tender. Shuffling closer, I let myself relax into the soft caress of the calloused pad against my skin. His lips twitch in a warm smile. But then it disappears and he drops his hand to his side.

I blink at him, not comprehending his actions. He averts his gaze and stares back toward the garage. “Do you think I should talk to him?”

“I don’t know, Master.”

No one has ever asked my opinion on anything. As a slave it’s not my place. I’m sure if that man from the Guild heard Matt asking me this, he’d say that was against regulations. But, then again, I doubt Matt cares for rules. Jimmy told me one time that he and Matt were always getting trouble in high school, even got kicked out a couple of times.

“Talk to who?”

We turn our heads to see Zacky leaning out of the doorway eyebrows raised in curiosity. I tilt my head; I don’t remember hearing the door open. Matt scowls at his friend.

“JD.”

Zacky comes out, shutting the door behind him. “Why you need to talk to him?”

Matt begins to shake his head, before changing his mind, and shoving his hands in his pockets. I see myriad thoughts pass over his face while he decides how to respond. But, Zacky seems to be thinking as well, because he comes to a sudden conclusion.

“You think he’s the guy who gave Val that card.”

“He is the same guy, right, Val?” Matt looks to me. I nod ‘yes’. He glances back at the guitarist.

Zacky rubs his jaw, thinking. Then he leans back against the wall staring hard at Matt. Neither of them says anything, though. They’re both pondering the implications of the information. At least, that’s what I assume they’re doing, ‘cause that’s what’s going through my mind. I mean, for one, the fact that he calls himself Jason, but it says on the card that his name is Joshua Douglas, who’s to say he’s trustworthy? It calls him out for being a liar. And I know for a fact that Matt hates any form of deceitfulness.

“Well, fuck...I don’t know what to say to that,” Zacky finally mutters.

Matt rolls his eyes. “That would make two of us, V.”

They fall quiet again. I shuffle my feet about. Matt looks at me, his eyes shadowed. Halting in my motion, I lower my eyes then hear him sigh a little.

“What do you think, Val?” He repeats his earlier question.

I tilt my head, looking incredulously at him. “What do I think?”

“Yeah, should I talk to him?”

Zacky is looking at me as well, his green eyes intense, causing my skin to tingle beneath his gaze. I look anywhere but at either man, eyes darting around the yard. But, then I decide to say something, even if it doesn’t make any real sense. Because, to be honest, I know what I would do if I had the choice.

“I don’t think so, Master. I think...maybe you should just wait. Um...let him mention it.”

Matt nods, slowly. “Yeah, that would make sense. Zack?” He looks at the guitarist.

Zacky toys with the labret on the left side of his bottom lip, brow creasing in an uncharacteristic frown. I glance at him wondering how he’ll answer.

He looks between us, before nodding. “I agree. He’s the one who said he’d seen Val and Chelle at the mall. If he thinks it’s important enough, he’ll mention it.” Folding his arms, he smirks as he adds, “At any rate, since we know he’s the same guy, perhaps if we search the name ‘Jason Denmore’ in connection with the card...maybe we’ll find something on the net.”

Matt chortles. “I hadn’t thought of that. Y’know, sometimes you’re not as dumb as you act.”

Zacky gives him the finger, pushing away from the wall. “Don’t stay out here too long. Brian was wondering what the fuck you two were doing.”

I giggle a little as Matt smirks and states in a mocking tone, “Tell him we’re out here fucking. That’ll shut him up.”

Green eyes taking on an amused glint, the guitarist snorts, lips curving in a smirk. “Yeah, or he’ll rib you on it for days.”

Matt shakes his head. “Get back in there, Baker. We won’t be long.”

Zacky wiggles his fingers at us and heads back into the studio, leaving us alone again. I peek at Matt who is frowning to himself, dragging his fingers through his hair. He lowers his hand and looks back at me.

“This is going to be awkward. But, we’ll manage, won’t we?”

I tilt my head. He frowns more.

“I mean, pretending that nothing’s doing.”

I nod in understanding.

He sighs, the sound heavy, tired. Holding his hand out to me he forces a smile on his face. I place my hand in his, gripping it firm. He pulls me close, into his arms, wrapping me up in his warm embrace, nuzzling into my hair. I lean into his body, feeling secure in his strong arms.

He keeps nuzzling then lifts his head murmuring low, “We’ll work all this out...”

I smile in answer, relaxing into his hold, comforted by the contact between us.

And, for a long while we just stand there, knowing that the guys won’t miss us, and will come and get us if they really need to.

Gah! I knew it...well, not exactly that he was the dude from the mall, but I knew he was up to no good!

^Yeah, he is deffo up to something


Part Twenty-One

He sat watching her as she nestled into the singer’s side. Matt had one arm wrapped firm around her shoulders, chin resting against the top of her head. His other hand was resting against the top of the drum kit, fingers tapping an impatient rhythm. But, Jason wasn’t really interested in him. No, he was focusing upon the young woman. When she and Matt had come back into the studio, he had kept half his concentration on her, the other on what the guys were doing.

Valary was not your typical slave. That much he was certain of. But, then he had had little contact with them, slaves that is, in the first place. Ever since he and his friend had started their business things had been disconcertingly quiet. The Guild was very tight on where slaves were sent and were reluctant to let loose cannon officers know the ins and outs of the association. This didn’t help matters, frustrating Jason’s efforts to track down any particular slave or sub within California.

His buddy wasn’t so unlucky in that department, but then he worked directly within the Guild. And he was a bit of an asshole about it. But then, being hard was the order of the day when one had to enforce rules and regulations. Enjoying it was another thing entirely, though, and neither man was willing to show any commitment either way.

Still, somebody had to do the dirty work. And being a mean bastard was more up his buddy’s alley. Even if there was no ‘umph’ behind it. Jason gave a wry smirk, shifting on his seat.

“Whatcha smirking at?”

Jason turned his head to meet the suspicious gaze of the rhythm guitarist, Zacky. Bright green eyes stared at him with an astute expression. He leaned back, crossing his arms.

“Nothing, Zachary. Just thinkin’ that my buddy’ll be jealous when he hears who I’ve been working with.”

“Really?” Zacky’s tone suggested he didn’t believe Jason.

He smirked some more. “Yeah, he’s bit of a bastard like that.”

Zacky shook his head. “I got a question.”

Jason lifted an eyebrow, tilting his head to the side, hair falling into his eyes. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Zacky drawled, “I know we already kind of asked you this, but. What’s your other job?”

It became tense all of a sudden; Jason felt the atmosphere shift between them. He also noticed Matt and Val looking across at him, an expectant air gathering. Rubbing his palms against his jeans, Jason worked through the choices that he had. He could lie, make something up, but then wasn’t that what he was doing anyway? He could be honest and tell the whole truth, but then that would open up a can of worms he didn’t think he was quite ready to reveal, just yet. He would have to settle for the middle ground.

“Working for the government. Nothing too exciting.”

“Is that right?” Matt had shifted his focus completely, now, frowning at him.

Jason nodded. “Yep.”

The singer narrowed his eyes. “That’s funny. The other day you said it was depressing.”

Jason snorted, his response somewhat bitter, “Oh, and what? When a job’s depressing, it’s exciting?”

Matt rolled his eyes. “Touché. But, what exactly is it you did for the government?” He was running his palm up and down Val’s spine, as she leaned her head against his shoulder, also listening to the conversation.

Jason went quiet again, rubbing at his knees, glancing at the singer and the guitarist, expression a little strained. Then he finally asked, “Why do you want to know?”

Zacky tugged at a lip ring, voice low when he answered, “Curious, I guess.”

Jason leaned back on his chair, tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans. His eyes were shrouded, hiding his thoughts. The corners of his lips twitched at the guitarist’s statement, but shaking his head, he sighed a little.

“Curiosity killed the cat, y’know.” He watched Zacky for his response, but it was Matt who spoke next.

“Never seen a dead cat yet.” He squeezed Val’s shoulders gently; she nuzzled against his shoulder, still watching. Jason shot a small smile her way, before meeting Matt’s sceptical gaze. They stared at each other for a long moment; Jason could sense the singer’s unease. He had felt it from the first day of joining the guys at Brian’s place days earlier. Matt was suspicious of him, and he couldn’t really blame him.

It wasn’t as if he had given the man any reason to trust him. However, on the other hand he hadn’t done anything worthy of suspicion either. At least he didn’t believe he had.

Smirking, he said, “It’s not something I talk about, much. I prefer to do this shit, y’know? Being a guitar tech.”

“Really.” Matt leaned back on his chair, removing his arm from around Val’s shoulders, and crossing both over his chest. Jason noted the tensing of the other man’s muscles, the sleeves of his tee straining at his tattooed biceps.

He folded his own arms, conscience of how defensive he must look. “Really.”

Matt stared hard at him, attempting to read him, but Jason knew he was good with his poker face, because the singer finally grunted and swung away.

“Right, well...perhaps we should get back to work.”

“I’m still curious about Jason’s other job,” Zacky said, frowning at the big man.

Jason shook his head. “It’s nothing worth being curious about.”

“Oh, really?” The guitarist stood up and leaned his hands against the back of his chair. “I think I’ll be the judge of that.”

Jason kept shaking his head. “It’s not even important. I’d much rather be a guitar tech full time, at any rate.” He felt as if he were a broken record, repeating himself, continuously defending his position.

Brian, who was sitting at the drums with Jimmy, going over several drumbeats, looked over toward them, frowning. “Why don’t you guys give it a rest? He obviously doesn’t want to talk about it.” He rubbed at his forehead. “By the way, Matt, you have any idea when Johnny’s coming around? He’s been kind of AWOL the past few days.”

Jason leaned back on his chair again, observing the singer as he shook his head without answering. Instead he pulled Valary closer to his side and focused his attention on the screen in front of him.

Jason then turned his attention to Brian who rolled his eyes before glancing at him in return. “Johnny’s our bassist. Pretty damn good too. But, he hasn’t been over for awhile...guess he’s making up for all the vacation time he missed.”

Jason snorted. “Some people don’t realise that touring in a band isn’t a permanent holiday, right?”

“Exactly. It’s our fucking job,” Brian said. “I mean, it can be a party sometimes, but other times, it’s just hard work. So, I can understand why he hasn’t shown. But, still...” He shook his head.

“And, out of all of us, he doesn’t really write much,” Jimmy added as he flipped his sticks in the air.

Jason lifted his eyebrows, casting his eyes toward each one of them. “Right. So, who out of you actually...?”

Brian pointed toward Matt and then at Jimmy. “These two write most of the lyrics, or at least the rough ideas. On the last album we all collaborated on lyrics, though. Adding verses and choruses where necessary.” He shrugged a little. “But, Matt and Jimmy come up with a lot of the musical lines before we get together.”

Jason chewed on his bottom lip, leaning back more into his chair. “Your last album was pretty sweet. Lyric wise.” Rubbing his jaw, he added, “The whole record was awesome...but the lyrics...there was just something about them. Kinda gives me hope...y’know? What with all the lack lustre music coming out these days.”

Matt glanced over again, face drawn, eyes narrowed. “What would you know?”

Jason, shrugging his shoulders, gave the singer a disarming smile. “Just stating an opinion, Matt.”

He stood, stretching his arms over his head, and wandered over to lean against the wall next to the computer desk. His gaze settled on Val again, where she was by Matt’s side, resting against his shoulder once more. Her dark hair, hid her expression from him, but he could read her body language well enough without it.

As he observed Val, she happened to catch him looking, and she cocked her head slightly, a questioning look appearing in her eyes. He just gave her a soft smile before finally turning toward Brian again. The guitarist held a couple of beers, one of which he offered to Jason.

“Here. Get that into you. Got more work to do.”

Jason took the cold one from him and moved to sit, preparing his mind for another long session of work. It was time to put aside thoughts of his other occupation, no matter how important it was, and get down to what he really wanted to be doing. Because, as much as his other work was a challenge and was never boring, he much preferred enjoying what he was doing than not. And having fun at work never killed anyone.

Uh-oh. I think Zack needs to stop asking questions or he's gonna end up on the receiving end of the scary friend from the Guild...

Scary indeed....

~~~~~~~


Part Twenty-Two – “Do you trust me?”

It’s been two days. Two days. And, I can’t shake this feeling of unease that has come over me since meeting JD at the studio. I can still see his eyes staring at me. Feel them, burning into my skin. Talk about the heebie jeebies. He gives me the creeps. I hope I don’t have to see him again anytime soon. Even if that means convincing Matt not to take me with him next time. Maybe I’ll ask Brian if I can hang out with Michelle again. Unless she’s busy working, or something.

Talking of Matt. He’s outside right now, in the back yard, cleaning the swimming pool. I don’t think I’ve ever described the backyard, have I? I don’t go out there much. But, when I have...it’s massive. Like...I’ve never seen a yard so big. Plenty of space for Bella. And the pool...I’m not kidding you, it’s big enough to fit almost twenty people in it.

Anyway, I can just see Matt through the large sliding doors; Bella is racing around him trying to get his attention. He’s laughing at her; I can see his shoulders shaking, and the dimples on his face. Love those dimples; they make him look less serious, less, forbidding. Love everything about him really, physically that is.

Oh, by the way, did I mention? He’s shirtless. A pair of basketball shorts is hanging on his hips, but other than that his tattoos, and his muscles, are all on display. Which I absolutely have to salivate over. Seriously, he’s just too...perfect. The way his biceps tense and relax as he’s plying the scoop into the water, the play of muscles in his back as he leans down to pluck larger leaves from the surface. It’s just so totally, mesmerising...

Jeeze, I can’t believe I just said that... I’m not supposed to think things like that. I’m his slave, not his girlfriend.

Looking away from the back door, I stare down at my journal, which I’m currently attempting to write in. Nothing is really coming, though. Too much to think about. Well, actually, I’m just too distracted by thoughts of Matt with no top on...leading to images of him with no clothes on at all...

Crap, I need to quit thinking about him like that. I’m not allowed... not allowed. Closing the journal, I curl up on the seat and prop my forehead against my knees. Every time a thought like this pops into my head, it feels as if my heart will break. Not being permitted to feel certain ways about my master never was an issue before; but, with Matt, everything is different.

I want to be able to love him. Never before have I ever wanted something so much. Ever. It hurts, that’s how badly I want this. Months ago, if someone had told me I’d feel this way about one of my masters, I’d have laughed it off, or at least given them a look as if to say that they’d gone mad. But, being in the middle of the situation is a different beast altogether.

Sighing, I rock my body on the chair, halting only when I hear the door sliding open and Matt’s footsteps on the tiled floor. He doesn’t speak, just approaches my chair, crouching down in front of me. I peek at him through my crossed arms. There is an anxious expression in his eyes, as he tilts his head at me. I try to smile, but fail, dropping my eyes to the floor.

He sighs, reaching out to tangle his fingers in my hair, stroking in a light, soothing motion. I lean into his touch, letting it comfort me. Just having him close is enough to calm my nerves, really. But, I drink up any contact he gives me, because, I guess I’ve been starved of tenderness. And it’s like a thirst that I never even knew I had is being quenched by any attention he gives me. And in a way, I think it shows me how much he cares...more than any words.

After several moments, Matt clears his throat. I peek up at him again. His brow is furrowing, thoughts flickering in his eyes. Before he can speak, though, the phone begins ringing in the kitchen. With a soft curse, he stands and heads for the other room, grabbing the phone.

While he plants his ass on the kitchen stool, he answers in a brusque tone, “Matt speaking, who’s this?”

I remain curled on my seat, watching and listening. He’s still in my line of sight, which is obvious as he glances toward me, an echo of a smile on his lips. The smile disappears in a matter of seconds though, a scowl taking its place. Whoever is on the other end of the line is causing the change in his demeanour, and I wonder who it is.

“What? You said you’d give us a week.” Matt’s voice is tight, his words rasping at the ends. “Yeah, it’s only been four days...barely even that.”

Stiffening, I realise who it must be; that guy from the Guild. I feel a shiver of apprehension course down my spine. I’m not ready to face that guy again...he scares me more than JD does, and that’s definitely saying something, considering how much he creeps me out.

I watch my master as he rants at the Guild guy, not listening to the words, just observing Matt’s actions. His right hand is resting against the bench. But, he’s far from relaxed. His fingers are curling into his palm, over and over, forming into a hard fist before relaxing. Then flexing once more. If looks could be transferred down the phone line, and if looks could kill, the guy on the other end would probably be dead by now.

I don’t think I’ve seen Matt so angry before. It’s not like he’s lost his temper. Even though he does have one. A temper that is. No, this is a white hot rage; he’s absolutely seething, but he is ultra-calm. Apart from the whole fist-clenching action he has going on.

“Fine,” his tone stiffens, as I listen to the final part of the call, “we don’t have anywhere to be today.” He hangs up without bothering to give the guy a ‘fare thee well’. Not that I blame him. And then, what he just said registers on my mind, and I start shaking.

“No,” I whisper to myself. “No...no...”

I can’t handle having that guy near me, not so soon after his first visitation. Just the mere thought of him sends a sensation of utter terror through me. It honestly gives me the urge to hurl. He just gives me this uneasy, sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Fear of what he can do to me if the Guild decides things aren’t right...

Matt looks toward me from the kitchen bench, frowning. Something shifts in his gaze, and then he crooks his finger at me. Trembling, I force my body off the chair, and drag my feet to where he’s sitting. He gives me a long, steady look.

Then he says in a low voice, “Do you trust me?”

I stare at him, trying to get my head around the question. “What, Master?”

Matt groans, rubbing a hand over his face. “Fuck. Val, do you trust me?”

Do I trust him? Do I trust the only master who has ever given a shit about me? Yes, I guess I do. I’ve never had anyone in my life I could trust...but Matt is definitely one person I can rely on to be there, and to never let me down. Even if it’s only been several months...yes...the answer is...

“Yes, Master. I trust you.” I feel a certain sense of conviction behind my words. And I see in Matt’s eyes that he senses it too, because he appears to relax; the set of his shoulders becoming less hard; mouth curving in a tender smile.

“Good...uh...great. Well, um.” He rubs at the back of his neck, the muscle in his right arm moving beneath the skin. “You can probably guess who that was.”

I nod, biting at my bottom lip. Matt sighs, the sound rough, exasperated. “We’ll have to finish looking at the guidelines. Fuck...” The curse is drawn out long, ending on a low groan. “I really wanted to spend today writing for the record.” He leans an elbow against the bench resting the side of his head against his hand, staring up at the ceiling, brow drawn in tight lines.

I wait, figuring he’s trying to decide how to go about this. His chest moves as he breathes, sweat beading all over his ink covered torso. Shifting his weight more on his elbow he brings his eyes back to my level.

“Go and get that file. It’s still in the living room.”

Nodding, I go and get it, coming back and setting it down on the bench in front of him. Matt flips it open, turning to the pages we have yet to look at. He lays his palm flat over it, glancing sideways at me.

“Ready?”

I mutter in response, “Doesn’t matter if I’m not, Master...we have to do this.”

Matt snorts derisively, but makes no move to disagree. Instead, tracing a fingertip over the print, he sighs and runs his eyes over the words. I lean in close, next to him, reading them, following the exact path his index finger is moving along.

The Guidelines, following from the introduction we have already read, lead on as follows:

1. The slave is property, hence must expect to be treated as such.

a. Care should be taken that the slave is kept in prime condition; it is an asset worthy of resale.

b. No more care should be given a slave as one would any other precious item in one’s household.

c. The slave should behave befitting property and not expect anything more than mere interest in their wellbeing from their Master.

2. The slave must not speak unless spoken to.

a. A slave should be seen but not heard at all times

b. The slave must defer to the Master at all times

3. The slave must do everything it is told, instantly and without question

4. Slaves are expected to service their Master in any conceivable way, including, but not limited to: sexual, food, and comfort needs.

5. A slave is for life, or until one wishes to sell them. The slave must never attempt to escape.

6. If the slave should break any rule, they must be punished accordingly

a. A slave who seeks affection from their Master must be either, ignored or given a verbal reprimand

b. A slave who speaks out of turn should be given either solitary confinement or physical punishment of any form deemed appropriate

c. A slave who refuses to obey is to be given physical punishment of any form deemed appropriate

d. A slave who does not serve her Master well is to receive whichever form of punishment befits the misdemeanour.

7. If a slave attempts to escape, the penalty is death by lethal injection.

Matt slaps the page shut, not bothering to read the final disclaimer, which I already saw, anyway. The one about slaves not having permission to fall in love with their masters. There’s really no need for either of us to go over that again, considering that it’s the biggest contention between us at the moment.

I peek up at Matt, gauging his immediate emotion. His jaw is tight, lips pressing together in a thin line. His expression is sour, and his eyes are dark, rage seething in their depths.

I shift a little, watching him, a little nervous. Wondering what’s going through his mind. Matt pinches the bridge of his nose, breathing deep, obviously calming himself down before he explodes.

“Fucking hell.” He growls, tossing the file away across the bench, watching with anger in his eyes as the pages scatter across the kitchen. I flinch away from him, an automatic reaction to the vicious tone that is evident in his voice.

Matt doesn’t notice, though, as he braces his forearms against the bench top, bending his head down and digging his fingers into his hair. A groan escapes his throat as he tugs at the dark roots. I don’t know how to respond to this, but my mind involuntarily flits to the fourth guideline. And somehow it makes me move closer to him.

Hesitantly, I lay a hand on his back and begin to rub it in slow circles. Like he has done for me in different circumstances. His skin is warm against mine, yet a little sticky from his earlier exertions. I keep rubbing over his taut muscles, easing the tension from them. Inexplicably, he relaxes at my touch, a deep sigh issuing from deep within him. His fingers ease their grip in his hair, both hands lowering to the bench.

And he sighs again.

I pause, leaving my hand resting against his back.

He murmurs his words barely audible. “Don’t stop.”

Complying, I move my hand more over his back, shifting even closer, so I can lean against his shoulder. He twists a little so he can reach my free hand with one of his. I let him hold on to it; anchoring me, and linking the both of us together. He strokes his thumb across the back of my hand like he does almost every time we do this.

I smile a little leaning more into his shoulder. He eases up more, turning his head so he can look at me.

“Val...” his voice is soft, something I’m not quite used to. Blushing a bit, I avert my gaze, my hand going still again. Matt smiles, the corners of his lips twitching. But his eyes are all seriousness. I let my eyelashes flutter. He squeezes my hand.

“Val.” He repeats my name. “I won’t let anything happen to you. You, uh...realise that, don’t you?” The earnestness of his expression is almost cute, it’s kind of endearing. However, his manner is solemn and I know what he’s really getting at is that I can trust him to keep me safe.

Moving my head against his shoulder, I mutter, “Yes, Master...” It doesn’t quite come out as a rote response, due to the small smile that sneaks an appearance on my lips.

Matt shifts on the stool, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me close against his chest. Inhaling, the scent of the cologne he uses drifts into my nostrils, a spicy, yet cool aroma that calms my nerves. I snuggle into him, eyelids sliding shut. He nuzzles into my hair, stroking a hand up and down my back.

“It’s going to be okay,” Matt whispers.

He sounds so sure of himself, and I hold onto that, knowing if I don’t I’ll fall apart. Peering up at him, I search his eyes for any sign that he’s uncertain, but his gaze is steely, filled with determination. That’s a huge relief to me. Closing my eyes again, I breathe out feeling secure in his arms.

No matter what happens now, I know that Matt will do everything in his power to protect me. Even if it ends up being futile, or better yet unnecessary, at least he’s here for me. I smile at that thought, mind drifting...

Matt nuzzles then moves me back a little. I blink, pulling out of my thoughts, looking up at him.

“What is it?”

He shakes his head. “Can’t have him walking in on us like this.”

I cock my head to the side, guessing exactly where this was heading. “So...where do you want me?”

Matt’s lips quirk at my intuition. “Bedroom. Stay there ‘til I call you.”

Hesitating, I rub at my arms, feeling goosebumps rise in anticipation. He narrows his eyes at me.

“You do trust me?” It’s still a question.

I swallow hard, before answering. “Yes. I do.”

Not answering right away, Matt stands, and moves around the bench, retrieving the pages of the guidelines where they landed after he threw them. Putting them back in the file, he sets it back on the bench, placing the side parallel to the edge of the countertop. Then he looks at me.

“Go on, then. He’ll probably be here soon.”

I nod, turning to make my way to our room, only glancing back once to see Matt walking through the door that leads into the living room. Watching his retreating figure causes a part of me to lose heart. I know he hasn’t gone anywhere; he hasn’t left me, but sometimes being in separate rooms gets to me. Separation anxiety, eat your heart out...

Taking a deep breath I turn back around and continue walking down the corridor. And as I steel myself for the coming encounter, I repeat like a mantra in my head, He’ll keep me safe...he will...he will...because I trust him.

I trust him.

I trust him.

Matt will keep Val safe, Matt will keep Val safe...I got my own mantra cos this fic is driving me crazy!

Yeh, that's a good mantra to have...

Be forewarned, this is a hard one to read, it was hard for me to write.

~~~~~


Part Twenty-Three – “What were you saying no to?”

“No. No. No.”

I can hear Matt’s voice and the tone is hard and angry. Obviously the guy from the Guild is pissing him off. He’s only been here ten minutes by my reckoning and it’s been going downhill since then. I can’t really hear what the other guy is saying; he isn’t a quiet man, but he’s not as loud as Matt when he’s in a temper – and I have the door closed. So, considering I can’t hear the Guild guy, I have no idea what Matt is saying ‘no’ to.

There’s a moment of quiet, where I can only catch a low rumble of voices then Matt’s rises again, tighter than before. His words send chills down my spine.

“What the fuck? No. I can’t do that!” More soft mumbling, then, “No. No. Damn it. No. She...it hasn’t been like that with her.” Pause. “So what? Just because she hasn’t... No. No...”

I really wish I could hear what the other guy is saying; it would help clear things up for me. Then again, either way I guess I’d still be anxious. Anything to do with the Guild scares me. The fact that they have the power to take me away from Matt if they think it’s necessary...terrifies me. I mean, I don’t think they’d remove me just because Matt is being lax with me, but...well they could.

Stiffening, I sense that it’s become extremely quiet and then I hear Matt again, his voice is much closer and then I realise I hear footsteps coming down the hallway, ahead of my master’s voice.

“Look. You don’t understand how it is with us. She’s always obedient. I don’t think any of this is necessary.”

The bedroom door flies open. I shrink back against the headboard of the bed as the guy, who came before, strides into the room. Matt is right on his heels, expression dark. But for the first time in awhile I don’t take any notice; my eyes are wide upon the Guild guy, and I can feel my body beginning to tremble. He glares down at me as he approaches the bed.

“Stand up,” he demands. I don’t hesitate. He’s from the Guild, hesitation could get me punished.

Scrambling off the bed, I stand beside it, eyes lowered to the floor. I’ve never forgotten the training I was given. Just because Matt’s easy on me doesn’t mean I can’t act this way for preservations sake. Still, I can feel the tension in the air. I don’t dare look toward Matt, because I know he’s furious. Judging by the coolness of the Guild guy’s tone when he next speaks, he knows this too.

“We have to do this, Matthew. It’s normal procedure.”

With my head down, I can only hear Matt’s response.

“Doesn’t mean I have to agree with it, Robert.”

I blink, still with my eyes fixed to the floor. So, that’s his name...Robert. Not that knowing his name makes me warm to him or anything. Definitely doesn’t make me any less frightened of the situation. The atmosphere is heavy between us now. The Guild guy, Robert clears his throat.

“Whether you agree, or not, is unimportant. This has to be done.” Then he says to me, “Turn around and lean over the bed.”

I shiver, this time darting a look toward Matt; his features are drawn in a cold mask, revealing nothing. He is keeping a tight rein on his emotions. He meets my eyes, though, and nods his head, an indication that I should obey.

Trembling, apprehension building inside my mind, I turn and brace my forearms against the bedspread. In this position, I am uncomfortably aware that my ass is sticking out behind me. I have never felt so vulnerable before. Except for when I had first slept with Matt.

There’s a moment of stillness and then Robert walks over to the bed. I see from the corner of my eye his left knee propping against the bed beside me. Biting my bottom lip, I wait fearfully for what’s about to happen. He pauses for a moment, then grips the back of my neck and shoves me forward against the bed, pinning me in a single rough motion. I gasp out in protest, grabbing at the bedspread, and twisting involuntarily beneath his hand.

He subdues me easily, digging his thumb into a pressure point.

“Master...” I whine out, turning my gaze toward Matt, pleading with my eyes. Robert tightens his grip before looking toward him as well, one eyebrow raised.

“Well, Matthew? You need to do this. Make sure she understands fully who is Master here.”

I see Matt scowling, but he doesn’t answer just looks at the two of us. Robert’s fingers are digging into my neck, and it hurts; I whimper softly, but hold still, hoping he’ll let go soon. But, more pressing right now is the fact that I have no idea what the hell he means. How exactly is Matt supposed to show me that he is Master? I mean, I know that already. And I understand that. Nothing could make me forget that I’m the slave...and he’s the master.

Robert presses me down more, sliding his other hand to my pants. I stiffen up, but remain still, shivering more. Matt growls low an almost possessive note to it. I guess he is willing to tolerate the other guy holding me down. But, I am his property, so for Robert to go any further than that...

He stalks forward, glowering at Robert.

“Fine. Let her go. And I will.”

I breathe hard, waiting, wondering; and then Robert releases me, backing away. I make to get up, but don’t get far, because next I know, Matt is pinning me to the bed, a knee firm against the small of my back. That shocks me; I twist my head a little and peer up at him quizzically. Matt’s eyes narrow as mine meet his. My curiosity turns to fear when I see the look on his face. His features are set in stern lines.

“Master...?” I hate the fact that my voice shakes, but I’m afraid, and a voice in my head is telling me that right now, Matt is not going to ease my fear. No, he’s going to make it worse.

This horrible feeling churns in my stomach, and my eyes begin to get wet. My breath hitches in my throat, which is tightening up. The room seems to be closing in on me. I can’t concentrate on anything but how close Matt is to me, everything else, including Robert seems to fade from existence.

I didn’t think this would ever happen with Matt. Even though I know he said he’d punish me if I ever disobeyed him. But this isn’t the case now. I haven’t broken any of his rules, or made him angry. No, this is all due to Robert, and the whole Guild thing. But, that’s not even the real issue. The thing is, I never thought I’d feel like this even if Matt was seriously punishing me. This feeling of absolute terror. It’s caught me off guard, and I don’t know how to deal with it.

Matt leans forward, over me, and places his hand where Robert’s was moments ago. I tremble, breathing faster, heart racing. Wondering what he’s going to do to me. Whatever it is, it’s obviously something they were talking about out in the kitchen. And perhaps it was what Matt was reacting so negatively to, before.

His thumb begins to rub slow circles over the pressure point at the side of my neck; a soft sob escapes that I can’t prevent. Matt inhales sharply, but then he moves his other hand to my pants and tugs them down. I whimper again; he keeps rubbing gently.

“Master, what’re you doing?”

Matt growls, “Don’t talk.”

He moves his hand over my bottom. I tense up, biting my lip hard. Tears threaten to spill over onto my cheeks. I don’t want this to happen. Whatever this is...I just want this to be over...for that Robert guy to be gone. I want...I want Matt to hold me and tell me he...he loves me...I want him to hold me and make every bad thing go away...

The tears fall and I let out a choking cry. “Master...please...”

Matt doesn’t reprimand me this time. Instead I hear a sound that sends a tingle down my spine. The jingle of his belt buckle, then the noise of his fly being undone. A shudder runs through my body as it dawns on me what he’s going to do to me. Tensing, I squeeze my eyes shut, tears beading thickly between my eyelids, a couple escaping, and trickling down my face.

Matt moves his knee from my back, between my legs, forcing them apart. I clench my jaw to stop my objection, it will do no good. He is going to do this, because he has to, and because Robert is standing there watching us. But, I wish I could tell what he was thinking, knowing that might make this easier to take...

He grasps my hip with one hand, lifting me a little; his other hand must be guiding himself into place. I whine out as I feel the head of his cock nudging up between my legs. No...not like this...I don’t...I don’t...no...

I hear Matt exhale in a rush. Then he pulls me back onto his cock, hard. He sinks into me in a single thrust. And it hurts. He’s big...and the last time we slept together he eased into me. This is only the second time ever... and for him to just shove into me like that...

I start to cry, sobs wracking my body. He ignores me, as he shifts his grip on my hips, holding me tight as he proceeds to fuck me into the bed.

Hoping that he might listen, I begin to beg him, even though Robert is there. “Stop. Please. Master, stop...” He doesn’t. He just keeps moving, harder too.

My heart feels like it’s breaking, at the same time as I’m attempting to block it all out. I can’t handle this, I want this to end. I clutch at the blanket, burying my face into it, soaking it with my tears. Eventually, as he keeps pounding into me, I shut down completely, distancing myself from my predicament... blanking out...

* * * * *

Sobbing softly, I huddle into myself, back pressed against the wall of the shower. Hot water shrouds me from the outside as I try to wash everything away. Matt is in the bathroom as well, pacing; Robert is long gone. I try to ignore him, wiping at my eyes.

“Val.” He’s looking at me now, though the curtain of water. I blink at him, but say nothing.

He clears his throat, hard. “Val, I’m sorry...”

I shake my head, averting my eyes. But I do respond. “You...you hurt me, Master...” I swallow hard and go on, voice cracking. “I...I was...I was so scared...but...you...you wouldn’t stop...”

Matt groans, and whispers, “I never meant to harm you...”

Peering out at him I can read the remorse in his eyes. But that doesn’t ease the ache in my heart. I feel that he’s betrayed my trust. He said he wouldn’t let anything happen to me...and look what’s happened. I still got hurt. It’s no wonder I don’t usually trust any man I come in contact with.

He grimaces and looks down at the floor, sinking to a crouch, raking tense fingers through his hair. I bite my lip, watching him.

He breathes out hard, speaking to the tiles in earnest. “He said if I did this the Guild would look favourably upon it and not interfere as much.” He glances at me again, jaw clenching. “I didn’t know whether to believe him on that, but I wasn’t willing to test him.”

I give him a long look, still hearing his initial protest, wanting to know what that was about; not knowing if I dare to ask. Matt tilts his head at me. I shiver, rubbing at my arms and dropping my head down against my knees. I hear him get up, and go over to the bathtub; peeking over I watch as he leans his ass against the edge of it.

He doesn’t speak, giving me a little breathing space. I am grateful for that. Trying to formulate the question I want is taking all my concentration. Breathing in and out, I count to ten. Then I peer up at him.

“Master?”

Matt nods to me that he’s listening.

I chew on the side of my cheek. “What...what were you saying ‘no’ to?”

His eyes meet mine, and the look in them shocks me. There is such a depth of sorrow and guilt in them that I can’t fathom it.

“Master...?”

Matt grips the edge of the tub, hard; his knuckles are white and the muscles in his forearms are tight. He leans forward slightly, pegging me with a hard look.

“What do you think, Valary?” He grits out, “Did you think I wanted to do that to you? Fuck, Val...I’d kill to take back what I just did to you. You think I didn’t notice how frightened you were...? Fuck. Val... I wish I could take it all back...I wish...” He pauses, chin resting against his chest. He takes several long breaths, nostrils flaring as he exhales. “Saying that won’t change what’s happened, though. Will it? I could wish as much as I like, but we’re stuck in this position. I made a decision and went with it, and you suffered because of it.”

Matt clenches a fist and presses it to his chest, just where his heart is. I blink at him; he stares back at me. “It hurts me here. Y’know that? It practically tore my heart apart to hear you cry like that.”

I continue to look at him. He groans, lowering his hand back to the edge of the tub, squeezing his fingers around it. He bends his head down, eyes glaring down at the tiles. I tilt my head then slowly stand, shutting off the water. Walking forward, pushing the door open, I step out of the shower onto the mat. Ignoring the fact that I’m dripping with water, I slowly approach him. He doesn’t look up until I’m standing directly in front of him. Even then, it takes several long minutes before he lifts his head, his gaze meeting mine.

“Master?”

Matt’s eyes flicker over my face. I wait not trusting my voice. He presses his mouth together in a thin line but then lets it relax a little.

“Val...” His voice is low, almost hesitant. Closing his eyes for a moment, he appears to be gathering his thoughts. I continue to wait. His eyelids lift after a few moments; his eyes are clear and bright. He shifts, reaching out to rest his hands on my hips; the contact is light the tips of his fingers brushing against my skin.

“Val.” Matt repeats my name, so much meaning in that one word. He draws in a deep breath before he says more. “Val, I...shit...this shouldn’t be so hard to say...” He tilts his head back, blinking hard.

“Master, what is it?” I try to look him in the eyes.

He scrunches up his face, myriad expressions flickering across his features; then he must decide something because he gives me a look. “Could I ask a favour?”

I nod.

“Call me Matt.”

That surprises me. “What?”

“Matt. Call me Matt...”

“But, Master...I shouldn’t...” I start to say; he cuts me off with a sharp shake of his head.

“Just for now...we can go back to the whole Master thing later...but, right now I need to hear you call me Matt...okay?” He lifts a hand and gently strokes a finger across my cheek.

I quiver, still trying to get my head around the request. The fact that he’s asking me is such a shock. I mean, it was different when we had sex for the first time, because I said it first...and then he demanded I say his name. This, this was a much different situation.

Still, he was asking it of me, and I was not going to deny him, especially if it helps him say what he needs to say.

“Okay...Matt...” My voice croaks on his name. The corners of his lips twitch faintly and he slides his hand back to my hip, closing both hands on my sides. I tremble as he pulls me a little closer to him.

He murmurs, “I’m sorry...” He leans his forehead against mine, searching my eyes. I blink, carefully; he’s so close we could almost get our eyelashes tangled. He closes his eyes for a moment, then opens them again looking straight into mine. There are so many emotions swirling in his deep gaze that I can’t recognise any of them. But when he starts to speak, I forget that and see only one emotion burning in their depths.

“Val...Val...damn, there is so much I should say.” His brow creases before smoothing out. “But, none of it matters right now, ‘cept this...” He looks me in the eye. “I love you.”

All the colour rushes away from my face, well at least it feels that way; I feel light-headed as if I might faint. I grab hold of Matt’s shoulders, afraid that if I don’t I’ll slide to the floor. He senses this and wraps both arms around my waist. Leaning into him, I start shaking, unable to respond to his statement. He nuzzles into my hair and murmurs.

“I know it might be hard to believe. Especially after what’s just happened...but...it’s true.” He begins stroking my wet hair. Obviously, I’m getting his clothes soaked, but he doesn’t seem to care about that. He keeps talking as he holds me close. “It might be hard for you to accept, right now...but...I just needed to tell you...I love you...”

His voice thickens and he buries his face in my hair. “I am so fucking sorry for what happened today...”

My throat chokes up at his admission. I press closer into his solid body, wanting to feel him as close as possible. His arms tighten around my trembling body. I begin to cry again, but this time there’s a different quality to my tears. I’m not afraid anymore, I’m just utterly exhausted. Matt notices this and, without a word, eases us both away from the edge of the bathtub.

Holding me in one arm, he grabs a towel. He turns me gently, drying me carefully. Then he wraps it around me, and lifts me in his arms, carrying me out to the bedroom. Placing me on the bed, he climbs up next to me, lying on his side. I blink at him. He smiles brushing the backs of his fingers against my cheek.

“Sleep, Val...I’ll stay here.” He sucks at his bottom lip, nodding a little as if to an unanswered question. “We’ll talk once you’ve rested.”

I don’t think I can, though. But he keeps stroking his fingers over my cheek and the repetitive motion begins to lull me. My eyes slide shut even as I fight to keep watching him. The last thing I hear as I slip off is Matt murmuring, ‘I love you’, one more time...

Wow, that left a lump in my throat. Poor Val, she must be in utter turmoil, Matt too for that matter. I really hope they find a way to get back at the guild for this.